


Blood in the Air

by WizardsGirl



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - What if Grisha genetically passed down the Titan Abilities, Angst, Anxiety Disorder, Attempted Murder, Attempts at staying in character with all characters, Being Titans, Blood, Blood and Gore, Blood and Injury, Blood and Violence, Cannibalism, Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, Childhood Trauma, Death, Depression, Fear, Gore, Hallucinations, Hereditary Influences, Horror, I use Jaeger instead of Yaeger because its freaking GERMAN, Insomnia, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Minor Character Death, Multi, Murder, Night Terrors, Original Character-centric, Paranoia, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychic Abilities, Shingeki no Kyojin typical violence, So much death, Terror, Titan Abilities, Titan Shifter Eren Yeager, Titan Shifters, Titans, Trauma, Twins, Violence, Yaeger Twins
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-06
Updated: 2020-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:13:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 20,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23036062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WizardsGirl/pseuds/WizardsGirl
Summary: Plagued with visions of horrors both past, present, future, and imaginary alike, Aria Jaeger lives in a constant state of terror. But, in this cruel world where real-life monsters far outweigh the fear of imaginary foes, the weight of constant terror wears a girl down.After all, if you spend your whole life afraid of everything...You eventually stop fearing ANYTHING...Even Death.
Comments: 17
Kudos: 68





	1. Prologue: The Nightingale's Song

**Blood in the Air**

**Prologue:**

_The Nightingales Song_

_Rise up, rise up, the day has come!_

_Rise up, rise up, there's work to be done!_

Over a hundred years ago, the Titans appeared, tearing through the countryside and ravaging humanity with unthinking, unfeeling hunger. Humanity, in a desperate bid to survive, built a colossal trio of walls, named for the three goddesses. Wall Sina, the innermost wall. Wall Rose, the centermost wall. And Wall Maria, the outer wall. Three walls holding the last of humanity. A shield, a haven, the last protection against the Titans…

A cage.

_The sun is rising and so must you!_

_Rise up, rise up, there's work to do!_

For a majority of the people within the Walls, this life was all they could ever dream of. They were safe, protected from the monsters of their nightmares, guarded by the three military groups that resided amongst them. The Garrison, who guarded the walls and manned the cannons that could kill Titans. The Military Police, who protected the people from themselves and traitors to the Crown. And the Scouts, those brave men and women who risked life and limb to venture out of the Walls to face the enemy head-on, who brought back precious information that had helped develop the weapons and gear and plans that would aide the people should the worse ever come.

_Lady Sina smiles upon you!_

_Lady Rose sings a glorious tune!_

_Lady Maria, who guards our home!_

_Rise up, rise up, you're not alone!_

Whether or not there was life outside the Walls. Whether or not there was _anything_ but Titans out there. The people of the Walls remained unmoving, uninterested, but for a scarce few who dared to wonder but never act, unless they joined the Scouts. Birds with clipped wings amongst fat, cowardly mice, too afraid of the wandering cat to even dare to glance out the window.

Made more helpless by inactivity. Lambs awaiting their slaughter.

_Rise up, rise up, I'm telling you!_

_Rise up, rise up, you've work to do…_

And, amongst these hundreds of thousands of people, these caged mice and crippled birds…

There's _her_.

Aria Jaeger, a young girl who dreams of a world outside these walls.

A world filled with people, with secrets and schemes.

A world... Where the monsters aren't _just_ the Titans.

_Rise up, rise up, the sun is high!_

_Rise up, rise up, to reach the sky!_

_These Walls… Stand… Strong…_

_Rise up, rise up, now move along…_

This is her story, and the story of her brother, Eren Jaeger.

_Rise up, rise up, there's work to do…_

**()()()()()()**

On March 30th of the year 835, Carla and Grisha Jaeger welcomed their twins into the world. Aria Jaeger was born first, exactly twelve minutes before her brother. Both children were small and weak, malnutrition due to a famine running through the Shiganshina District wearing on both them and their mother. Had only one of them been born, it would have been better, but splitting the nutrients between the two of them meant that neither got quite the amount that they needed to grow healthy.

From the beginning, however, it was clear that Eren was healthier. By the time they were a year old, Aria was prone to high fevers and illness, to the point that her parents worried she wouldn't survive. These fevers continued until a particularly bad one just before the twins turned five. It lasted seven days, high enough that her tiny body fell into seizures, her lips cracked and bled, and her tongue swelled in her mouth. Ice baths melted, water dried too quickly to provide much help, and the Jaegers began to give up, especially Grisha, who, as a Doctor, knew the likelihood of survival as little Aria's temperature rose dwindled faster and faster.

Then, on the seventh day, Grisha, who had passed out in exhaustion at her small side, woke to his wife crying out. The Doctor, fearing the worst, looked at his daughter's face… And found her blinking slowly at him, awake for the first time without delirium. Her fever had broken… She would live.

She just… Wouldn't be the same.

**()()()()()()**

_**June 9** _ _**th** _ _**, 840** _

Carla was hanging the laundry with little Eren outside. Grisha could see them both through the window, laughing as their son playfully dodged around the clean sheets. The Doctor smiled, cradling his cup of tea as he watched them. Two of the three lights of his life, laughing in the sunlight, happy and bright and free of the anguish that had plagued their home just months ago. The only thing that would make the view complete would be—

The sound of a door creaking open to his side had Grisha looking over, smile fading slightly with concern as the pale, teary face of his daughter stared at him from the cracked doorway, shivering with fright and green-gold eyes wide.

"Aria, sweetheart?" he asked, concerned, as he pushed his seat away from the table. Aria remained still, her tiny chest heaving as she panted quietly for breath, eyes wide. Ever since that final fever, the usual illnesses that had always plagued his daughter had disappeared… Only for horrific nightmares to take their place. _More like night terrors_ , he once thought, and the descriptor fit still in the here and now, months after that first night they were all woken by her horrified, anguished screams. They left his precious daughter in a constant state of fear, seeing things no one else could, visions of horrors she couldn't understand let alone explain. He'd had to explain to Carla, to other patients, to friends and neighbors and even the Military Police once, that it was a result of that final fever, of her brain being nearly cooked. That she literally had no control over it, no way to explain or comprehend just what she was seeing, and that they may very well plague her for the rest of her life.

…There were some who took this as a sign that she was ruined, simple, _broken_. But she was still their little girl, their little song. She was just… Different, now, more special than before.

He only wished that she wasn't plagued by this unending terror.

"Did you have another nightmare, sweetheart?" He asked her softly, slowly moving towards her. Sudden movements would startle her, make her cry out as the monsters she sometimes saw while awake overwhelmed her still-developing mind. Those wide eyes stared at him from the cracked doorway, her tiny body shivering harshly as he slowly knelt in front of her, just out of his arms reach, movements precise and steady. Like she was a frightened animal that might bite or flee, unsteady on its feet.

"It's alright now, sweetheart," he murmured, shoulders relaxed and arms slowly spreading. "You're awake and Daddy's here. There are no monsters, nothing to fear, it's alright," he murmured soothingly, arms open, face gentle. Aria stared at him, eyes flicking to-and-fro frightfully, panting breaths slowing. With a shuddering sob, she burst through the door and slammed into his chest.

"D-Daddy," she wept; Grisha wrapped her in a gentle hug, careful not to squeeze too tight so she wouldn't feel like she was being restrained, lest he accidentally trigger another vision. It had happened a lot, in the beginning, after all. He and Carla had learned quickly that restraining their daughter in any way led to thrashing, terrified fits. She couldn't help what she saw in that state.

She never could.

"I, I, I was so s-scared," Aria choked out wetly against his neck, tiny arms clasped tightly around his neck.

"I know, I know you were," Grisha soothed, stroking a hand tentatively through her black hair as she hiccupped wetly. "It's alright now, you're awake, you're okay." Aria shook her head against him in denial, sobbing picking up, and Grisha's heart ached that she still felt unsafe even in his arms.

"W-we're not," she wept, "th-they're gonna come get us, an', an' they're gonna have us all killed," she wept wetly; Grisha blinked, startled.

"What?" He asked her, startled. "No, no honey, no one is coming to kill us," he tried to assure; Aria shook her head sharply, knocking her forehead against his jaw and pulling away, eyes closed tightly as she wept, tiny arms pulling away to rub at her tears with her fists.

"N-no Daddy, they _are,_ they really, really _are_ gonna kill us," she wept heavily.

"Who, honey?" He asked, desperate to try and disprove her fears. "The Titans? They can't get past the wall, dear, I promise they can't—"

"No!" She wailed, hands covering her eyes and shaking her head rapidly. "Not them! Not them! _Them!_ " She wept.

" _Who_ , Aria?" Grisha asked, carefully cupping her heaving shoulders with his hands, her tiny, frail shoulders that bowed like the weight of the world rested on them. "Who, then?" And, sobbing, Aria dropped her hands and looked up at him with wide, tear-filled eyes, and Grisha's heart _stopped_.

"The _Marley's_ ," she whispered, the usually warm green-gold of her eyes glowing inhumanly bright, silvery blue at him. " _They're gonna kill us all._ "

In that moment, as she buried her face once more into his chest, his arms falling limp to the floor as he stared, horrified, at the open doorway behind her.

 _Sometimes, the visions she saw were just the result of her imagination,_ he dazedly thought, staring blankly as she wept against him, whimpering in fear.

_But sometimes…_

Slowly, Grisha lifted his arms and hugged his daughter close, head bowing as he trembled, eyes clenched tightly shut as his own tears began to fall.

_Sometimes…_

"I'm so sorry, sweetheart," he whispered. "I am so, _so_ sorry…"

 _Sometimes, she saw_ _ **memories**_.

**()()()()()()**

_**December 18th, 844** _

Aria quietly helped her mother prepare for dinner, green-gold eyes drifting back and forth nervously even as her face remained calm. She continued to slowly cut the carrots her mother had set before her, small fingers moving steadily.

"You always cut them so neatly, Aria," Mother told her stepping closer slowly. She moved her hand forward, making sure Aria could clearly see it, before gently brushing it through her short, messy hair. A particularly bad vision had seen the young girl chopping her own hair off so close to the scalp she'd cut herself, her parents waking to Eren's voice calling to them worriedly and finding their daughter rocking herself fitfully, blankly staring at the wall and all but bald, clutching a knife in one hand and blood dripping down her cheeks with her tears. Since then, they'd kept her hair short, kept it at ear length at its longest…

And kept all blades and scissors in their room unless they were there to watch them being used.

Carla smiled tenderly and leaned slowly down to press a kiss to Aria's forehead. The nine-year-old's hands spasmed faintly, her green-gold eyes flinching, before they closed and she pressed up against her mother's kiss gently. Carla stroked her head once more, achingly tender, before pulling away and giving her daughter her needed space… And blinking away her own tears as she did.

 _She's having such a good day today_ , Carla thought, smiling brightly as she returned to stirring the stew. Quietly, she hummed her daughters favorite tune, the children's song for waking up. It was a cheerful song, though when she sang it herself, Aria often sang it slowly and sadly, Carla couldn't bring herself to do the same. It was a good day and, as soon as Grisha returned from checking in on the Ackermans' with Eren, it would be even better.

"Mama," Aria whispered softly; making Carla immediately look to her, only to find her daughter pushing the now-finished carrots and knife away from her, staring half-lidded out the window. A quick glance showed nothing particular, and Carla worried that one of the frequent visions her daughter had was about to come to be.

"Yes, sweetheart?" she asked tentatively; Aria glanced at her, eyes returning to the window, before she looked down, folding her hands in her lap. At this angle, she looked so much like Eren, like a second boy instead of the daughter Carla had so hoped for and loved so dearly.

"…You're gonna need to set another plate," Aria finally whispered, tiny fingers twitching with nerves even as her expression stayed still. "Eren's bringing Mikasa home."

"Oh?" Carla asked, relaxing, her worried smile turning relieved. "Do you think so? Well, I'd be happy if she came to visit! You and Eren need more friends—"

"No," Aria interrupted quietly, looking away, staring down at the ground beside her now with dark, sad eyes. "He's bringing her _home_ …" Carla blinked, taken aback, and the silence built until Aria carefully pushed away from the table and started shuffling towards her room.

"H-honey?" Carla called, startled. "Where are you going?" Aria paused, tiny shoulders still bowed, one hand resting against the doorframe as she looked over her shoulder. Carla's heart stopped, eyes going wide, at the blank, dead stare her daughter gave her.

"I've got to make Mikasa a bed," she stated quietly. "…And some more blankets," she murmured, turning slowly and beginning to walk away again. "She's gonna be cold…"

Carla watched her daughter walk away, an uneasy chill crawling down her spine. Sometimes, sometimes the things her daughter saw, things she _said_ , scared Carla. Things that made her daughter scream like she was being torn apart, like she was seeing people pulled apart. Sometimes, she wouldn't scream at all, but just rock herself back and forth in fear and whisper about horrors that Carla couldn't understand.

_And sometimes, just sometimes…_

Carla looked up later that night when Grisha and Eren arrived, little Mikasa Ackerman standing blank-faced and shivering as Grisha met Carla's eyes grimly and stated that the little girl would be staying with them from now on. She looked on, eyes wide, as Eren and Aria took the little girl by her hands and pulled her into their room without hesitation. And she stared up at the ceiling of her bedroom that night as her husband slet beside her restlessly, the story he'd told her of the Ackermans _murder_ , and remembered her daughter's dead, sad eyes looking at her…

_Just sometimes…_

_Sometimes the things she said came true._

Listening to the faint sound of Mikasa crying, of Aria's voice joining in a low, sad hum of the children's _Rise Up_ lullaby, of Eren grumbling and no doubt joining the two girls in Mikasas bed to hug them protectively as he always could, Aria never lashing out at him unless trapped deep in her dreams. And, listening to them, her daughter's words earlier ricocheting around her mind, Carla's hands tightened into fists on the blanket, and the cold chill of fear crept once more down her spine.

_And if this time it came true…_

_What about the next time?_

_What else could her daughter see?_

… _What other nightmares could come true?_

**()()()()()()**

_The day the Colossal Titan appeared, peering over the Wall like a curious cat staring into a bin of mice, Aria Jaeger, all of ten years old, stood in the street beside Hannes of the Garrison, eyes locked on him and hand pointing at the massive Titan. She never glanced in the direction, her wide, dead eyes locked on the adult as they had been since she appeared, but her pointing finger rested unerringly in the correct direction._

" _I told you," she whispered blankly, quietly, the words echoing eerily in the blond mans ears as he pulled his eyes from the horror looking down on him, on **all** of them, to meet those solemn, sad eyes. "_ _ **I told you**_ _something bad was going to happen today…"_

_And, as she let her tiny finger drop, her arms hanging limply at her sides, the Colossal Titan kicked a hole in the wall… And, for just a moment, for just a split, horrifying second, Hannes would swear her eyes had been_ _**silver** _ _…_

**" _I. Told. You…"_**

**()()()()()()**


	2. Chapter One: Shiganshina's Fall

**Blood in the Air**

**Chapter One:**

_Shiganshina's Fall_

_**Three Weeks Before the Fall…** _

_Blood like rose petals, scattering in the wind…_

" _Promise me! Promise me that you'll_ _ **live**_ _!"_

_A smiling Titan, blond hair dancing in the wind, gentile expression even with blood spattering down her chest._

_Mama pinned beneath their house, a giant boulder crushing her there._

_Eren's cries as they're carried away._

_Dina, Dina, Dina, Dina, Dina—_

_A massive hand clamping down on the top of the wall as the Colossal peers down into their cage like a cat looking at a pail of mice._

_Blood like rose petals scattering in the wind and screams like bird song whistling through the streets._

Abruptly, Aria's eyes opened, familiar tremors running through her body and flickering shadows on the edges of her vision. Staring up at the ceiling of her room, moonlight still shining, Aria rolled slowly onto her side, staring across the room to where Eren and Mikasa slept in their own beds. It had taken her a long time to learn how to wake up without screaming. Sometimes, sometimes she couldn't help it. But during those times, she didn't care.

Sitting up slowly, Aria turned her head to stare to the south, her bedroom wall blocking her view of the Wall.

"…Something is coming," she murmured softly. "…I need to tell someone." Staring at the wooden, familiar walls of her room, the shadows that constantly flickered and swayed across her vision swirled into view in front of her, spiraling in shapeless forms for several moments before they coalesced into the shape that threaded dread through her body.

"…Dina… Fritz…" she breathed as she gazed on the genteelly smiling Titan. The phantom taste of blood in her throat had Aria swallowing heavily, eyes flicking away from the shadowy form as phantom screams echoed in her ears.

Looking down at her lap, Aria fisted her fingers into the blanket beneath her, unable to sleep under the confining cloth when it made her think she was going to be suffocated in her sleep. Now, it gave her something to hold onto, something to ground her scattered, frightened thoughts.

She was an old hand at this by now.

"…I'll tell someone tomorrow," she murmured, staring down at her lap bleakly. "Even though they won't believe me… I'll tell them tomorrow…" Nodding slowly, Aria carefully climbed out of bed, silent even as she flinched instinctively away from a sharp-moving shadow, ghostly fingers trailing across her cheek in what felt like a final goodbye. Aria stood still, eyes closing as she breathed out a slow, shaky breath, before her eyes opened and locked ahead of her, ignoring the shadows as usual.

The house was quiet but for the nonexistent screams and weeping of the shadows, as it usually was at this time of night. Aria passed slowly through despite that, fingers nervously tapping against her thighs as she moved. It was her usual routine, a slow patrol through the house, checking on the _real_ people in her life. It was how she could tell if something she saw or heard was _there_ at times, watching everyone else's reactions. The number of times she heard the door open or someone cry out in pain, her flickering eyes would dart to those nearest her, double checking to see if they had heard or seen it.

Daddy was the only one who had figured it out, she knew, and he'd told Mama, Eren, and Mikasa. Eren and Mikasa were the only two to actively respond, however, Eren calling her a dumbass or a scaredy-cat if there was nothing there, and Mikasa just holding her eyes and either shaking her head or nodding. Mama would startle, sometimes, when she caught Aria staring, before smiling and asking what was wrong. Daddy would verbally respond after glancing around.

Aria… Aria loved her family.

— _Blood like rose petals, scattered on the winds—_

Shuddering sharply, Aria paused to reach up and grab her short hair tightly, fisting her hands in it and closing her eyes tightly as the shadows turned to severed limbs and begging sobs of anguish filled her ears. Rocking slowly back and forth, Aria silently mouthed the words to _Rise Up_ as she did so, squeezing her hands rhythmically so that the small sparks of pain were in the beat of the song. After a few minutes ( _hours, days, s_ ) the screaming wails of the dying or tortured fell away as the low, sad tune of the usually happy song filled the empty spaces. Carefully, she opened her eyes and glanced around the room, slowly releasing her hair and peering around warily.

…The shadows were quiet and back to small flickers at the corners of her awareness.

Letting out a shaky breath, scalp pricking with dull, throbbing pain, Aria moved forward and peeked into her parents room. Her Mama was fast asleep, curled up beneath the blanket and snoring just slightly, a trait Eren had picked up. Aria felt her lips twitch faintly, before her eyes darted around the room.

…Daddy wasn't there. And, and he didn't have any patients or they _all_ would have been woken and informed. And there was no sounds from the dark bathroom besides the faint, wordless whispers of the shadows, which meant…

…There was only one place Daddy went when he wasn't in bed at night.

Quietly, Aria turned and padded back to her room.

If Daddy was in the basement, she wouldn't see him again until morning. He'd offered to bring her down there once, while Eren and Mama were out, but she refused. It made the Shadows restless, made them curse and cry, made the visions of the Marley's and Titans and death so much clearer in the waking world.

And it made daddy so very, very sad…

…Aria climbed into her bed, sitting with her back to the wall and her arms around her knees, staring out the window to await dawn. The Shadows sighed and murmured around her, pulling forward to craft the beginning outlines of whatever monsters they wanted, untilshe was slowly rocking once more, purposefully cut-short nails digging into her forearms. She kept her eyes on the sky, ignoring her constant companions and the stories they tried to tell.

She would tell someone tomorrow about the Bad Thing that was coming.

She would tell them even if they didn't believe her.

No one but Daddy had ever believed her, after all.

But…

But—

_A massive hand grasping the top of the Wall as the Colossal stared down at them all._

_Screams echoing in the streets and blood in the air like rose petals._

" _Promise me! Promise me that you'll_ _ **live**_ _!"_

**()()()()()()()**

_**Two Weeks Before the Fall…** _

"Hey look, it's Crazy-Jaeger!" A young voice called as Aria quietly wandered away from a stall, cradling a small basket of fruit to her chest. Aria paused, turning her head enough to see past the Shadows who began to growl and jeer and cry quietly in her ears. It was the group of boys that usually picked on Armin and Eren, she noted, eying them blankly as they ran towards her. In a moment, she was surrounded, the boys staying well out of her reach after one too many instances of her visions being triggered violently by them grabbing her. There wasn't quite anything like coming out of a vision to find herself being coaxed off a roof by Hannes and his squad and finding out she'd given two of the bullies a concussion and cracked the jaw of the third.

 _Even idiots can learn_ , she thought, and the shadows hissed in agreement.

"What y' got there, Crazy-Jaeger?" the blond boy asked, his gray-haired friend bouncing on his toes as their large friend cracked his knuckles.

"…Apples," she replied simply, honestly, staring at him with dead, still eyes. The shadows at his feet were writhing, twisting into reaching hands shaped like it own, desperate, terrified cries echoing in her ears. His sneering smile faultered, nervous sweat beading his face.

"S-stop staring at me like that, you, you _freak_!" He snarled, lunging down to scoop up a rock and flinging it at her face. Aria ducked her head slightly, one eye closing as sharp pain lit up her temple. The rock hit the ground at her feet, bouncing ominously as she slowly looked down at it. Blinking once, she watched as blood dropped from her head, spattering against the ground. Her eyes went wide, stunned, as the shadows screeched, and—

_Blood like rose petals, dancing on the wind._

_Screaming in the streets as thundering footsteps made the walls shiver and shake._

_A gentile smile dripping with blood._

" _Promise me!"_

_The Colossal Titan, peering like a malevolent cat over the wall to—_

"—The South," she breathed, coming back to herself to find herself rocking slowly back and forth, face coated in blood and Hannes, drink-flushed but serious, kneeling in front of her. Her eyes darted down to the ground nervously, away from his slightly-hazy but concerned eyes. Her apples lay spread out in front of her, her basket overturned. The bloody rock sat innocently at her feet, the ground around it spattered even more now.

"You back with us, kiddo?" Hannes asked her, Aria dragged here gaze from the blood-spattered ground, staring at the Garrison member, before turning her head.

"Something bad is coming," she stated simply, voice quiet but clear. "It'll come from the South…"

"Huh?" Hannes murmured, following her gaze to squint uncertainly to the South, lifting a hand to shield his eyes. "Well, I sure don't see anything, kid… You sure it'll be from the South?" Aria froze, eyes latching onto the soldier, stunned. He...

She, she told him and…

_(One Week Previous:_

" _Oh sure, kid!" The Garrison soldier laughed as his friends sneered at her. "Oh 'something baaaad is gonna happen!' Pull the other leg why dontcha!" he laughed, they_ _ **all**_ _laughed, jeering and mocking her as she stood, eyes locked on the ground and hands in fists at her side._

_One of them dumped what was left of his booze over her head, jeeringly stating that at least now she smelled like she had a_ _**reason** _ _to act crazy. The others laughed harder and Aria turned away slowly to walk home._

_She told them but…_

_(Now)_

"But…" She breathed, making Hannes look back to her with a slow blink. "No one, no one e-ever believes me?" She managed, tears slipping from her eyes as she stared at him, eyes wide, and Hannes eyes went wide as well, before gentling. He let out a little huff and reached over to her, just as slow and obvious as her parents, and set a careful hand on her head. It covered her whole head, heavy and _real_. It made her wounded temple sting and bleed some more, but…

"I may be an alcoholic asshole, kid," he told her easily, gently petting her head. "But I ain't that _much_ of an asshole. Somethin' scares you that bad, makes you freeze in place like a rabbit when a hawk fly's by? That's real enough for me." Aria stared up at him, eyes wide as tears continued to slowly fall, and the blond man huffed. "Come on quit it with the waterworks," he complained, standing up and rolling his eyes, taking his hand from her head.

Moving before she can think, Aria latches onto his hand, clinging to his large, calloused fingers, making the man twitch in surprise, blinking down at her.

"Fourteen days," she told him desperately, her whole-body trembling. Hannes, stared, wide-eyed, stunned as he stared down at that small, bloody face that stared at him with such genuine _fear_ …

"In fourteen days, something horrible will happen," she told him desperately. "It'll, a lotta, p-people, they, their gonna _die_ ," she choked, her shaking getting worse. She swayed in place. "F-from th-the South, it, it'll come from the _South Wall_ , you gotta, you gotta believe me," she wept, and Hannes cursed as her eyes started to roll in her head. "P-please b-believe… Me…"

"Hey, hey kid!" Hannes cried, catching her as she fell and cursing as she slumped, unconscious in his arms. Grumbling, he scooped the kid up, grimacing at how _light_ she was. "Christ you're lucky you're cute, kid," he grumbled, absently scooping as many of her apples back into her basket as he could. It took him a bit of maneuvering, but soon enough he had her sprawled against his back, a small frown curling his lips at how hot she felt. "A fever?" He muttered, spitting to the side. "Last damn thing you need, brat," he sighed, shaking his head and making his way toward the Jaeger household. As he walked, he found himself looking off to the South.

"…Fourteen days, huh?" he murmured consideringly, before sighing heavily and continuing forward. "Damn it, I need a drink…"

**()()()()()()**

_**One Week Before the Fall…** _

"Sweetheart, what are you doing awake?" Grisha asked, finding Aria standing in the middle of the kitchen in the middle of the night. He pulled off his glasses to rub at his eyes. "Did you have another nightmare?" Aria stood there, completely still as she stared out the window. It struck Grisha, then, exactly _how still_ she was. He'd grown used to her constant fidgeting, her steady rocking and twitching, her darting eyes. Now, she was like a statue, barely breathing as she stared out towards the South Wall, as she had been for weeks now at every chance. Watching her for a moment, he sighed and walked over to her, making sure his footsteps were clearly heard. Slowly, he knelt next to her, using the pale moonlight to peer into her face. He stilled as he found silvery-blue eyes locked on something unseen, half-lidded but unusually _focused_.

"…Aria," he said quietly, firmly, staring at her face. "What do you see?" She remained quiet, unmoving, softly breathing, for long enough that Grisha almost sighed again, thinking that she wouldn't answer. Sometimes she didn't, sometimes she _couldn't_.

"Seven days left," she whispered, soft and scared. "Seven days until… There's… There's so much blood and screaming… So many bodies…" Slowly, she turned her head, staring at her Daddy, silvery-blue eyes suddenly wide. Slowly, she reached for his face, fingertips brushing his bearded cheeks. "Promise me," she breathed, staring intently at him. "Promise me that you'll _live_ …" Grisha's eyes went wide as he stared at her, before tentatively taking her small hands in his.

"I promise," he told her, watching the silver color fade back to the green-gold he preferred to see her with. Aria's shoulders slumped, her lids suddenly heavy. The dark circles beneath her eyes grew darker every year as her visions robbed her of more and more sleep. Gently, he pulled her into his embrace, carefully lifting her up. "Let's get you back to bed, sweetheart."

"Daddy…" she murmured, slumping against his neck as he cradled her close. Grisha made a low sound to show he was listening. "Who… Who's Dina?" Grisha froze, heart stuttering in his chest, eyes wide. Slowly, he turned his head just enough to see his daughters face, only to find her eyes still green-gold and already unfocused with sleep. Swallowing harshly, eyes burning he stroked a gentle hand through her hair.

"Dina was… Was someone I knew," he murmured hoarsely. "Someone I knew a, a long, _long_ time ago… Don't worry about it, Aria," he murmured. "Don't worry about it… Daddy's here, and I promise you don't have to worry about anything, alright? I'm here," he whispered achingly; Aria hummed softly, face against his neck as she faded away into sleep.

Later, laying next to his sleeping wife, Grisha would stare up at the ceiling before lifting an arm to shield his eyes, teeth gritted as he fought back tears.

 _Dina…_ he thought, unable _not_ to. _Dina…!_

Laying on her side, back to her husband, Carla closed her eyes as the sound of her husband crying made her heart ache, his muffled sobs sounding so much louder in their quiet bedroom. And she knew that, whatever their daughter had told him, whispering in the kitchen in the middle of the night, was something she _didn't want to know_. Rare were the times she'd seen Grisha emotional, and each time it hit like a hammer. Keeping up her feigned sleep, Carla let herself roll over and curl against her husband, who's breath stuttered before he slowly wrapped his arms around her.

That night, neither of them got much sleep.

They rarely did on the nights that Aria shared something with them.

**()()()()()()**

**The Day of the Fall**

Aria quietly wandered the street, head bowed, and eyes locked on her feet. It was today, it was today, _it was today_. The shadows were utterly silent, forming grasping hands and wide-opened maws around every corned, lunging at her after every blink. Eren was out with Mikasa, gathering wood, and the usual bullies were out an about on the other side of Shiganshina, no doubt looking for Armin. She liked the blond boy, he was stronger than he thought. She could _see_ his future self, just a little, and the things he would eventually do…

He was far stronger than _anyone_ gave him credit for.

"The Scouts are back!" A voice called out suddenly, and the people all around her seemed to fall to the wayside, and Aria was swept into the crowd, quickly finding herself standing at the front, watching listlessly as the decimated Scouts wandered through, some horribly injured, some unscathed— _Physically_ , at least. She watched as a woman ran to the scouts, begging for her son. Aria watched as she was given just an arm, as she begged to know that he son didn't fall in vain.

The moment the soldier fell to his knee, screaming about their failure, Aria felt her fears vanish for the _first time since she was five._ Slowly, she stepped forward, towards the weeping, shaking man. One step, then another, until she was suddenly running forward. The man looked up, the soldiers who had been moving towards him looking up too, just in time for Aria to throw her arms around the man's neck.

"It's okay," she told him, voice soft but clear, squeezing him tightly. "It's okay that you're scared. It's okay that you're scared, that you don't want to fight, that you want the nightmares to not be real. It's _okay_ ," she stated, pulling back and leaving her hands on the man's shoulders. She didn't smile, just looked him in the eyes and, for the first time in years, she knew her eyes weren't frightened, weren't skittering or darting, but _focused_. The soldier, his tear-filled eyes wide, stared back, and Aria let a tear fall as she stepped back from him. In a sharp movement, she locked one fist behind her back, and slammed the other over her heart.

"Despite your fear, despite the anguish and hardship and loss you and your fellow Scouts have gone through, you have continued to serve and work for the best for humanity," she stated clearly, standing tall and steady as she saluted him, holding his eyes as they stared, stunned. "We thank you for your sacrifice!" Aria dropped forward into a bow, holding it under the stunned focus of the soldier, the grieving mother, the other Scouts and the civilians nearby.

"W-what," the soldier managed; Aria straightened.

"Thank you," she stated simply, clearly, before she glanced to the side, just in time to see Mikasa drag Eren into an alley. "Ah," she murmured, "I have to go, my little brother is being an idiot…" Turning, she looked at the wide-eyed, crying woman, and set her hand against the woman's shoulder as she cradled her son's hand. "I'm sorry for your loss," she told the woman simply, quietly. "But _thank you_ , for raising such a brave son." The woman choked, hand covering her mouth as she clutched her son's limb tightly to her chest, fresh tears falling as she bowed her head and wept. Glancing over the Scouts who were still staring, Aria offered them all a short nod before turning and running towards the alley her brother and Mikasa left through.

 _It's happening today,_ she thought as she ran down the alley.

 _The blood and the screams and the death… All of it is happening today…_ Aria closed her eyes, coming to a stop, panting, already almost home.

 _And yet,_ she thought, hands clenching into tight fists at her sides. Hre head lifted, looking up at the sky, eyes wide as a tear slipped down her cheek, watching the birds fly past over head.

 _And yet,_ she thought again, green-gold eyes wide and _focused_ even as tears continued to fall and a small smile curled her lips.

 _This is the most alive I've felt,_ _ **ever**_ …

**()()()()()()**

Aria watched as Mikasa chased after Eren again, Mama fretting worriedly at her side.

"Aria, I need you to tell me something," she finally said, kneeling down to grab Aria's shoulders, turning her to look at her, her gold-brown eyes wide and worried; Aria blinked up at her. "I need you to tell me… Tell me you both live, you, your brother, Mikasa, _all of you_ , please, _please_ just tell me you all live, years and years from now…" Aria froze, eyes going wide as she stared up at her Mother.

"I..." She started, staring into those gold-brown eyes, so bright and worried and loving—

_(Blood like rose petals on the wind.)_

— _Ba-thump. Ba-thump._

 _My heart,_ Aria thought, staring into her mother's eyes, her hands shivering at her sides. _Why… Why does my heart hurt?_

"I… I promise," she whispered hoarsely, staring in Mama's eyes. "We, we live for, for years and years… I promise." Carla closed her eyes, letting out a shuddery sigh of relief.

" _Thank God_ ," the woman breathed. "Go, Aria. Go try and talk some sense into your brother," she sighed, exhaustedly relieved. "And be _careful_ , please," she whispered; Aria gave a shaky nod, stumbling forward one step before beginning to run. As she ran, she looked over her shoulder, back at her house. For one second, between heartbeats, the scene changed, and Aria felt terror claw at her throat as the vision of a massive boulder crushing their home briefly over-shadowed the warm home she'd been raised in.

 _Mama…_ she thought, facing forward with tears in her eyes as she ran. _Mama, why… Why does my heart hurt so much?_

The shadows dove at her suddenly, massive grasping hands and hissing, smiling mouths that no one else could see. And, even though she could tell they weren't real, Aria found herself dodging them, fleeing from imaginary monsters. It lead her in circles, gasping for breath and soaked through with terrified sweat.

Finally, _finally_ , the shadows retreated, and Aria staggered to a stop, bending over with her hands on her knees as she gasped desperately for air.

"Whoa there, kid," Hannes's voice called, surprised from his seat at a nearby card table. "What the hell have you been runnin' from, huh?"

"Probably some imaginary creature," one of his fellows mocked, gaining a snicker from their third player; Hannes grunted, glaring at them briefly before heaving himself to his feet.

"Shut up, assholes," he grumbled, ambling over to Aria with a slight stagger. "You okay, kid?" He asked; Aria heaved one last big breath and straightened up to answer.

"I'm fi—"

 _NOW, NOW, NOW, NOW, NOW_ the shadows _screamed,_ and Aria choked, freezing, staring up at Hannes with huge eyes.

" _It's here_ ," she breathed; the blond man blinked.

"What is?" He asked; Aria stared up at him. She lifted a hand slowly, pointing off to the side behind her, trembling faintly. She didn't look, didn't _need_ to look. She already knew what was going to be there.

_The Colossal Titan, staring down at them all like a malevolent cat…_

The look on Hannes face, as he followed her finger, was all the reaction she needed.

"I told you," she managed to whisper, dragging Hannes's eyes right back to her. She continued to point towards the Colossal, the Shadows silent and still around her, the whole world seeming to hold its breath. " _I told you_ something bad would happen today…"

 _Now_ … The shadows sighed; Aria let her hand slowly fall, limp and still at her side and, at the same time, the Colossal Titan kicked down the gate. Shiganshina had been breached.

_(Her eyes glow silver-blue for just a moment, just one split second, long enough to give Hannes a frigid chill down his spine, sobering him faster than seeing the massive Titan did)_

"I. Told. You," she stated softly, simply. The screams started in the distances, the dangerous shapes of Titans emerging from the dust clouds.

And still, little Aria Jaeger stood staring up at Hannes, for the first time in his memory not looking afraid at all. Just… Solemn. Knowing.

 _Holy shit,_ he thought as he stared down at her, terror clutching his chest as he stared down at this little girl. _Holy_ _ **shit!**_ _How the fuck did she_ _ **know**_ _?!_ The Garrison soldier thought, frozen in place, unable to move. _And… And…!_ Staring into those eyes, those sad, old eyes in a little kids face, sweat beaded down his forehead.

_What else can she know?!_

And then…

There was no time to continue wondering. The Titans were there. And Hell had truly descended.

**()()()()()()**


	3. Chapter Two: Parasites

**Blood in the Air**

**Chapter Two:**

_Parasites_

The panic set in immediately. People in every direction started running for the interior gate. In the chaos, Aria slipped away from Hannes, the shadows sighing and humming and urging her on. She was knocked into several times by the uncaring, nearly grabbed by frightened adults on other times. She recovered and dodged both as she continued on. She was exhausted already, her earlier race through the streets leaving her with aching legs and gasping breaths.

 _I have to make it home_ , she thought as she forced herself onward, ducking under a broken beam moments before it collapsed. _I have to get home… I have to!_

" _Promise me! Promise me that you'll_ _ **live**_ _!"_

Her eyes narrowed, her teeth grit, Aria threw herself down a set of steps, tripping at the end and falling into a harsh roll. Hissing out a breath, she forced herself up on shaky arms, then to her feet.

"I have to promise!" She gasped, beginning her desperate run once again. From the corner of her eye, the Shadows snarled and lashed out at her, and Aria instinctively threw herself to the ground again, rolling out of their way—

And out of the way of the grasping hand of a five-meter Titan.

Aria was already back on her feet when she realized it wasn't a vision, wasn't imaginary. And for a moment, she froze, stock still, eyes huge and breath held as she stared up at the smiling face with it's too-wide smile and too-small eyes under ratty brown hair.

 _This… this is… A Titan…_ She thought, mind blank and eyes beginning to ache from lack of blinking. For as long as she remembered, she had seen them in dreams, seen them eating people, sowing destruction wherever they went, and being killed in turn, a never-ending cycle of violence and death and horror. But…

But.

 _This isn't like in the dreams,_ Aria thought dazed, trembling as that massive hand once more reached for her.

 _RUN_ the shadows _roared_ ; Aria choked on a gasp, and obeyed, just as she always did when the shadows grew too loud. She flung herself away from the hand, once more just barely dodging it, the wind following it's passage threw her hair into disarray. Stumbling, more scared than she's _ever_ been outside of a vision, Aria ran for her life.

It wouldn't be the first Titan she dodged on her run, just one of the smallest. A massive foot slammed down beside her, miraculously tossing her out of reach of a grasping hand, flinging her through the air and away from the two Titans that had intercepted her. The Titans, both around eight meters, crashed into one another, too focused on their prey to notice one another, They fell onto a row of houses, crushing them and flinging debris into the air. Aria staggered up to her feet and continued to run, ribs aching, legs cramping on occasion, bleeding from multiple scrapes and cuts, but she _couldn't stop_.

She rounded the corner of her street, just in time to see Hannes running away from the destroyed ruins of what was once her home, Eren screaming over his shoulder and Mikasa clasped under one arm and…

And Mama pinned, unable to move, as the Smiling Titan from her nightmares approached.

"Mama!" She screamed, frozen on the corner of the street, knowing if she approached the Titan would see her.

"A-Aria!" Her mother cried, shaking her head. "Run away! Run away as fast as you can! Don't come near, okay?! Just _go_!" She screamed; Aria choked on a sob, hands clamping over her mouth as, with wide eyes, she stared at the approaching Titan. "Run away, sweetheart! Run away and don't look back! You have to! Promise me!" Her Mama shouted desperately. "Promise me that you'll _live_!" Aria gasped, eyes wide,

_Those words… Mama's words…! That.. That means…!_

( _Blood like rose petals on the wind_ )

 _My heart…. It… It hurts so bad, Mama,_ she thought, tears falling, before she shook her head harshly, hands falling to her sides in white-knuckled fists.

"I PROMISE!" She screamed as the Titan reached for her Mama. "I PROMISE WE LIVE! FOR YEARS AND YEARS! I **PROMISE**!" she screamed; for a split second, Carla stared at her daughter, her sweet little song, and a shaky, heartbroken smile weakly flitted across her tear covered face. Unheard by Aria, the woman let out a soft sob.

"My brave, _brave_ baby girl," she choked, before a sharp scream tore from her as the Titan grabbed her up.

"Mama!" Aria screamed, staring with huge eyes as the Smiling Titan slowly lifted her struggling mother. "MAMA!"

The Titan bit down.

Blood spatter flew…

…Deadly rose petals on the wind…

The world seemed to freeze around her once again, her wide eyes locked on the Titan as it swallowed what was her Mama, her sweet mama who she scared sometimes without meaning to, who still loved her even though she was broken. _Mama…_

An arm suddenly clamped around Aria's waist, wrenching her through the air and out of the grasp of a familiar five-meter Titan.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!" The Garrison soldier who held her cursed, sweat drenched and terrified but teeth gritted with determination. "Damn it, kid, what the hell did you think you were doing?! Do you _want_ to get eaten, dumbass?!" Aria stared blankly at the rapidly moving ground beneath her, limp in the soldiers hold as he flung them through the air with his ODM gear. His cursing was frequent as he dodged around buildings and Titans alike. Upon reaching the inner gate, however, he didn't wait to throw her summarily into the crowd with another curse before turning and returning to the fray. Aria watched him go, engraving his face into her memory even as trembling, gentle hands pulled her up onto broad shoulders and moved her forward through the crowd. Another unknown soldier accepted her from the stranger who carried her, passing her behind him onto the waiting barge. She's shuffled around, despondent, weeping faces surrounding her, until she finds her bloody, scraped-raw hands being tentatively clasped by Armin, who peered up at her from under his bangs.

"A-Aria?" He asked her softly; Aria blinked slowly at him. "Y-you're hurt…" A sharp tremble went through her, and Aria swallowed. …Her throat hurt from screaming.

"I… I'm okay," she whispered hoarsely. "I… I just…" A tear slid down her cheek as she lifted her head to look at him. "I s-saw Mama… Get _eaten_ ," she whispered; Armin's breath hitched, blue eyes wide and horrified. Aria's lips trembled before she tightened them, closing her eyes and taking a slow, shaky breath, before gently squeezing his hands in return. Armin sniffled, eyes watering as he looked up at her. Tentatively, Aria gave him a smile, small and shaky but there. "It's okay, Armin," she told him simply, quietly. "It's okay to be afraid. To be sad and mad and _so scared_ … Because, that's part of being alive." The boys eyes went wide, and Aria looked down at their hands, watching as her weeping cuts stained his hands red.

"…And we're alive," she whispered softly. "We're alive to feel these horrible things and, and that's what matters." Swallowing heavily, Armin nodded shakily.

"E-Eren and Mikasa are over here," he whispered; Aria nodded weakly and let him pull her over. Eren was staring blankly, wide-eyed and in shock, and Mikasa was dull eyed with grief and worry. Slowly, Aria sat between them, folding her hands in her lap.

"A-Aria," Mikasa started softly; the older girl shook her head.

"I saw," she said simply. "I saw our house… And, and Mama and that Smiling Titan…" Mikasa's breath caught and Eren shook at her side. "…I saw…" Silence fell between them for several moments as Mikasa tentatively pressed against Aria's side and Armin did the same thing on Eren's other side.

"I'm going to kill them all," Eren breathed hoarsely, green-blue eyes wide with rage and grief. " _All_ the Titans… I won't stop… Until those disgusting parasites are all _exterminated_ …"

"…Agreed," Aria murmured, shifting one of her bloody hands over to clasp his own. Eren gripped it tightly, neither of them caring about the stinging burn of their wounds.

"I _swear it_ ," he choked out, teeth gritted, eyes wide and tears on his cheeks. " _I swear it_." Aria squeezed his hand and lifted her eyes to stare off towards Shiganshina as they left it behind. For once, the Shadows didn't make her nervous, didn't play visions over her sight and make her shudder or cringe.

"I'll help," she stated simply, quietly, as she stared off into the distance.

 _I promise,_ she thought, closing her eyes and letting her head rest against her little brother's shoulder tiredly. _I promise Mama…_

_We'll live._

**()()()()()()()**

Wall Maria had fallen to the Titans and, in response, the nearly three-hundred thousand refugees that moved into Wall Rose brought with them massive pressure on the already struggling people there. Famine was already a concern before and became a guaranteed fact after the Fall. People were fighting over a single piece of bread, over a place to sleep, over cheap work that at least paid _something_. The people of Rose were bitter, their Garrison soldiers losing their own rations to try and keep the extra mouths fed.

…If it wasn't for Grandpa Arlert, Aria knew that she, Eren, and Mikasa would have starved to death. As it was, they were struggling, too young to work or join the Military, just extra mouths that had to be fed. Helpless baby birds, screaming with mouths wide open for any scraps they could get.

…Parasites feeding on the rest of humanity.

Eren hated it. It grated against his pride and sense of strength. He already felt weak and useless because of Shiganshina, the idea of being forced to rely on the mercy of others… It made his temper high, made his words sharp and his eyes dark.

…It was why Aria was here, instead of waiting at the tiny home the five of them managed to claim for themselves. The Shadows had whispered directions to her several times in the last few weeks since the Fall, had guided her through more than one situation that had left her with either an extra bit of food, a few extra coins, or getting a small job that saw her with rare treat like fresh fruit or a hot bath, even. Sometimes, however, their mischief simply got her lost or hurt. Once, they had even led her into a brothel where a few of the customers tried to buy her before the Madame had shooed her out with hard eyes and an order to come back when she had her first blood if she wanted to work.

This time, they seemed extra eager, whistling and snickering in her ears as they gamboled around the dirty alleys. She didn't know where they were taking her, she never really knew, but she trusted that they wouldn't lead her towards anything that would see her seriously injured.

 _It's very windy today,_ she thought, using a twitching hand to shield her eyes. _But it's not going to rain for a while yet…_ A sudden burst of gleeful laughter from her right had her glancing over, only to find herself being smacked in the face by a hat. Sputtering, she grabbed the cloth, pulling it down to frown into the alley it had come from, only to find it a dead end filled with snickering shadows.

"What am I supposed to do with this?" She murmured, peering down at the black hat in her hands. The Shadows laughed again, and filled her head with the singing tone of blades being unsheathed and the coppery scent of blood. Blinking twice, Aria flinched faintly as the hat in her hands was suddenly drenched in hot, fresh blood…

 _Everything around her was coated in blood_.

Squeezing her eyes shut, lifting the hat to cover her face for a moment, Aria rocked back and forth with her fingers clenching the hat's rim as tightly as possible. After a few moment, her every breath stopped tasting like copper and Aria slowly lowered the hat again to tentatively peer around her.

No blood, no shadows. Just her and the hat in the mouth of a dead end. Crisp wind, blue eyes, the smell of the nearby sewer…

"Okay," she breathed out slowly, peering down at the hat again for a moment. "Where do you belong, then?" A single shadow darted from behind her, lunging up onto a roof. Humming to herself in thought, Aria looked down at the hat briefly before shoving it onto her head and trying to find the best way up onto the roof.

Several minutes and freshly cut palms and knees later, she managed it, panting for breath even as she walked carefully over the tiles. The shadow darted around her before flinging itself down the roof, across the alley, and away.

"W-wait!" She called softly, before giving chase. She slipped several times as the shadow led her on the chase, her bare shins bloody and scraped raw, her shorts giving her no protection at all. Her arms were the same, and the bruises she would no doubt be getting on her shoulders and hips from the falls would no doubt hurt badly later. The longer the chase took, however, the less these wounds hurt and the more _alive_ she felt. The thrill of the chase, of the _race_ , the _risk_ , it made her focus, made the everyday terror and nervousness and flinches disappear. She had a goal, and destination, and as long as she was working towards it, the fear…

 _It didn't matter_.

The shadow ahead of her spiraled rapidly before flinging itself down off the rooftops and into an alley and, without thinking, Aria followed, diving headfirst off the roof and managing to flip herself, landing awkwardly on her feet and then to her knees. Immediately, she stood up, ready to continue following the shadow only… It was gone.

"It's… A dead end," she murmured, confused, as she stared at the wall little over a meter away. She looked up at the roofs again, eyebrows furrowing.

"The hell? Where'd you come from, brat?" A voice chimed up behind her; Aria spun, eyes wide, to find a tall man dressed in black and armor, gruff and grumpy looking with a hand in his hair. A blond woman beside him, dressed similarly, stared at her in disbelief.

And on the ground between Aria and them, a man in a MP uniform lay twitching in his final death throws, throat slit and face-up in a large pool of blood.

… _Oh,_ she thought, staring at the dead body blankly. _That… That would explain the blood… On the hat…_ With the thought, her head jerked up, eyes darting away from the fresh corpse with deliberate nerves.

"Hat man!" She blurted instead, reaching up and gripping the hat on her head.

"Eh?" The gruff man stated, squinting at her. "How the hell did you find that, kid?" Aria blinked, then padded forward when a Shadow crept into her peripheral. She edged past the corpse, toes bare inches from the blood pool as she did, refraining from looking at it… Him. Looking at _him_.

 _Being a corpse doesn't make him less human,_ she scolded herself firmly. _You've seen plenty of dead bodies before. They're still human no matter what._

"Here you go, Hat Man!" she declared, plucking the hat from her head and holding it out to him. The blond woman looked amused now, despite the agitated twitches of her fingers, obviously barely refraining from reaching for a weapon. The man plucked his hat from Aria's grip, eying it for a moment before letting out an amused chuckle, dusting it off and putting it on his head.

"I'll be damned, kid," he stated, eying her with stone-dead eyes and an amused smirk. "Thought I'd have to go running around this shit stain of a place tryin' to find this damn thing, after already havin' to run around chasing _that_ dumbass," he nodded towards the dead man behind her before continuing, "and here you come with it in hand. Now, not that I ain't grateful, you understand, but…" Still smiling at her, the man shifted a hand, pulling out a wicked, curled dagger. The light caught the bright silver, making its reflection flash over Aria's face.

"How did a little thing like you know where to find me, hmm?"

**()()()()()()**

Kenny Ackerman was not a man who made mistakes. He was the one who cleaned up _other people's_ mistakes, usually with a blade or a bullet. It's what he did best, killing people, after all, and it was the closest thing to fun he'd ever had, so he could even say he loved his job, unlike most of the unlucky shits in these godforsaken walls. But, since he was a man who didn't make mistakes, he always made sure that no one could find him outside his squad.

So imagine his surprise when some little street rat comes falling into the alley where he'd just cleaned up some nobles mistake, the body not even done bleeding all over the ground yet. And the little brat barely takes a moment to stare at the body before hopping over to him like some ugly ass puppy to hand him his hat. The same hat the asshole on the ground had managed to knock off his head while fleeing into the shittiest alleys he could find.

He didn't make mistakes, so how the hell did this little shit find them?

Holding his blade, Kenny waited for the kid to answer him, already knowing he'd be leaving two corpses behind when he left but wanting to know so he could make sure it didn't fucking happen again.

"Oh, I followed the shadows!" the brat told him easily, green-gold eyes darting, not like a liar's but more like a skittish mutt. Like the strays acted when someone held food out to them but they knew it would lead to an axe to the head instead of a free meal. "Not that you'll believe me, since no one believes me, but that's okay! The MP have my medical records, too, so everyone knows I have brain damage and suffer from severe hallucinations…" As if on cue, the brat's voice trailed off, eyes going dull and blank and listing off to the side. Kenny watched, brow lifted, as the kid glanced to the side intently before those eyes darted up to his face, like he (she? Fuck if he could tell) was double-checking something. And damn, were the kids hands twitchy as hell.

"Sure, kiddo," he said, eying the kid, who perked up again, fingers fidgeting against their thighs.

"Question!" The brat announced, peering up at Kenny uncertainly. "Um, did, uh, did you already loot him?" They asked, awkwardly gesturing behind them at the corpse. The question had Kenny blinking, surprised, and just… Staring.

 _What_? He thought, staring as the kid ducked their head, fingers fidgeting with their tattered shirt hem.

"It's just, well, I got my baby brother, adopted sister, and adopted brother to look after," the kid mumbled, ears going red. "And Gramps, he, ugh, he's pretty old and, well, he doesn't make much and, um, the MP's make a lot more money… And, well…" The kid shrugged awkwardly. "Dead bodies don't need to eat, y'know?" Kenny stared blankly down at them for a moment.

 _This brat has balls of steel,_ he thought, his lieutenant unknowingly repeating the thought as well. Slowly, a sharp smile curled his lips, before he threw his head back with a cackle.

"What the hell, brat!" He laughed. "Kid after my own heart here!" Chuckling, good mood fully-restored, Kenny decided that one corpse would be fine. He'd hunt down the kid's information later, just in case, but for now, he just chuckled, tucking his blade away and reaching over to ruffle the rats nest stuck on the kids head, making the kid duck down sheepishly. "Go for it, brat. Who knows, maybe we'll work together one day if you keep that sort of attitude." Tilting his hat slightly and offering the kid a wink, he turned around to leave.

"Er, Captain," Caven started, her eyes darting from the kid, who was already padding over to the dead body, and back to him.

"Leave it, Caven," he ordered easily, glancing over his shoulder.

"Right," she agreed immediately, padding after him; Kenny paused in the alley mouth.

"Hey, brat!" he called; the kid looked up, bloody hands clutching a heavy purse. "You gotta name?" The kid blinked at him twice, eyes darting to-and-fro like a mouse, before offering him an uncertain smile.

"Aria Jaeger!" she (Huh, so the brat's a girl… Color him surprised) called back, obviously glancing at something beside her, peering at the wall like she was reading something. She lit up again, lifting a hand to wave tiny bloody fingers at them. "Bye Hat Man Kenny! Bye pretty lady Caven!" Startled, the two adults turned fully to look at her again, but the brat was already scrambling up the wall in what had to be the _least_ graceful climb Kenny had ever seen in his life.

"What the hell," he muttered, squinting as the kid stood up on the roof only to almost immediately fall. She then trotted off, happy as a clam with a dead man's pouch of coins and blood literally on her hands. "I've seen blind, dead _fish_ climb better'en that, fuck's sake, brat," he grumbled, rolling his eyes with a snort.

"Maybe we'll get lucky and she'll fall and break her neck without us having to try and find her again," Caven noted, shaking her head with an eye roll, and Kenny snorted.

"Hell, maybe so," he muttered, readjusting his hat as he turned away. "Be a damn shame, though. Funniest little shit I've met in years."

"If you say so, Captain," Caven agreed mildly, and Kenny let himself be pulled into the familiar banter even as he led the way back towards Wall Rose's Interior. He had a date with the MP's records. After all, brats with brain damage that the MP were involved with were surprisingly few and far between.

Most didn't live long enough to be noted, after all.

He made sure of it.

(Kenny Ackerman didn't make mistakes, but he was _damned good_ at cleaning up after others.)

**()()()()()()**

Aria was pleased with the amount of money she'd managed to get off the dead MP, even if his face was popping out of the Shadows and his blood clung to her skin even after it was washed away. No doubt she'd be dreaming about him tonight, maybe for the next week or so, but… The amount of money hidden in the bloody pouch she'd tucked into her underwear to keep it from being stolen, it was enough to feed the five of them for a few _weeks_ if they used it right!

"I'll give it to Armin," she murmured, carefully hopping down from the roof, wincing at her blood and wound covered shins and arms. "…Eren's gonna be mad," she murmured, grimacing down at herself, shifting slightly, uncomfortable with the bag of money stuck between her legs. Once she hit puberty and grew breasts, she would have a better place to hide her money, but it would do for now. She was just grateful that the blood had already dried on the bad before she realized that carrying an obvious pouch of coins would _not_ do her any kind of good.

Sighing softly, Aria began limping her way towards their home, ready for the scolding she'd no doubt be getting. The shadows to her left morphed into an image of the Hat Man, and she couldn't help but smile slightly. He had been more than willing to kill her, she knew. It had been in his eyes, an easiness when it came to death that spoke of something similar to what her brain did. Mikasa was like that, willing to end anyone who threatened what she deemed as hers. It was strange, seeing it in an adult, but maybe that would be was Mikasa was like in a few years but… Kinder.

Anyways, the Shadows had prompted her, forming pictures of the Garrison soldiers who liked to mock her and giving her the inspiration for her bluntness about her condition. After all, she wasn't a liability if she was insane and the Military could easily provide proof of it. No one would bother even asking her, after all.

(No one believed her, anyways. Only Daddy ever had, and Hannes. Only them… Only them.)

Sighing softly as she arrived home, Aria took a moment to blink the blood away from her vision, grimacing as the sound of choking, gasping breaths of the dying echoed in her ears before she pushed the door open.

"I'm back!" she called as she entered, closing the door behind her. It was time to face the music, after all…

**()()()()()**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I adore Kenny, okay, he's the funniest asshole, fight me. Also, Levi totally got his sense of humor and it is hilarious.


	4. Chapter Three: Planning for the Future

**Blood on the Air**

**Chapter Three:**

_Planning for the Future_

Once they'd gone their separate ways, Aria wasn't honestly expecting to see the Hat Man Kenny again. He wasn't in her dreams, and the shadows seemed content enough to continue as they did before, so she assumed that it wouldn't matter. The last thing she expected was for the man to come looking for _her_ , and, if the shadows hadn't whispered in wordless excitement while taking his form against a wall, she wouldn't have even noticed him following her. As it was, she watched the shadows for a bit, staring at the blank wall they were on, until she figured out which direction he was in. Then, with an echo of laughter from the shadows, Aria turned in the opposite direction and trotted away. She weaved aimlessly through the alleys and the dilapidated markets, past brothels and patrolling MPs and Garrison soldiers alike.

The shadows urged her on, mocking laughter and gleeful whispers chanting in her ears, flickering visions of Hat Man in pursuit, of pointed fingers in different directions. Until, finally, she found herself in a dead-end alley and, with an exhilarated smile, heart pounding and fear gone once more, she scrambled up the wall and laid in wait behind a chimney. There was the sound of ODM gear, the whizzing hiss of the wires pulling, and the thumping of feet smacking into the roof tiles just moments after she hid.

"What the shit, brat," Hat Man's familiar voice groused. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you were fuckin' with me…" Aria covered her mouth with her hands, the shadows giggling and shushing her, peering around her hiding spot for her. Biting her lip, Aria resisted the urge to check for herself where he was. She hadn't played like this in years, and, despite the memory making her heart hurt, it still felt so _good_ to do something _fun_ again…

The shadows suddenly disappeared, making Aria blink in surprise, before hesitantly turning to peek around the chimney.

"Boo!" Hat Man whispered, staring at her from directly beside the chimney, and Aria couldn't hold back a startled squawk as she flailed. The older man immediately cackled at her, and Aria huffed slightly before giggling.

"Found me," she sang, smiling up at him.

"Sure did, brat," he replied, leaning against the chimney with a smirk. "Now, why'd you make me chase you t' hell and back if you knew it was me? I thought we were friends!" He declared, placing a hand over his heart. "It hurt, kid, really hurt, right here." Aria laughed again, giggling a little as she pulled herself to her feet to peer up at him.

"I knew you'd chase me!" She told him honestly. "And no one really chases me for fun anymore! Everyone's too busy working, but I can't work real jobs because of my brain damage. I make people uncomfortable," she informed him, purposefully blasé even as she looked away from him, a pinch of hurt making her fidget.

"Yeah?" He asked, crouching down to smirk at her. "Well, it'll take more than a lil bit of crazy to scare me off, brat," he informed her, reaching out and roughly messing her hair; Aria couldn't help her flinch but offered him a small smile in response.

"You'll leave when you get what you want or figure out if its worth it," she told him easily. "Everyone does. And that's okay. It's okay to be selfish." Hat Man arched a brow at her.

"Cynical brat ain't you," he mused, before scoffing faintly. "I didn't come to get some weird ass self-acceptance speech, kid. I got some questions and you're the one who's gonna answer them," he stated, expression smoothing out, eyes cold, and Aria blinked up at him before shrugging.

"Okay," she replied simply, easily, absently glancing to the side when a shadow transformed into a strange man who smiled gently at Hat Man. She stared at him for several seconds, name on the tip of her tongue, before the shadow-man turned and lifted a finger to his mouth.

 _Secrets_ he whispered, and Aria bobbed her head absently before turning her eyes back up to Hat man.

"Can I wear your hat while we talk?" She asked; he arched a brow.

"You gonna tell me nothin' but truths?" He asked in response; Aria blinked.

"I don't lie," she told him easily. "It's not my fault most people don't believe me."

"It's a deal then," he stated, plopping down onto the roof and smacking his hat onto her head, making Aria stumble with a squeak. Huffing at his smirk, she sat down next to him, back to the chimney.

"Go ahead and ask, then," she told him easily; the man hummed.

"Where's your daddy at?" He asked easily. "He made some serious enemies just after Maria Fell." The shadows writhed, spatters of blood and familiar glasses glinting under moonlight as screams and tears filled the air—

"He died," she told him, looking up at the noon-day sun. "He got torn apart by a couple of Titans… He screamed a lot," she whispered, wrapping her arms around her knees and setting her cheek against them, the hat on her head shifting enough that the man next to her could see her eyes. "Mama died like that, too," she told him solemnly. "I watched as the Smiling Titan picked her up and snapped her back and bit her in half. Blood like rose petals, flying on the wind," she whispered, staring at the shadows next to Hat Man as they replayed the scene. Screams echoed in her ears, the meaty crunch of flesh being torn into, the scent of copper and sewage, making her choke back a gag, eyes closing and fingers digging into her bruised and scraped legs.

"Huh," Hat Man replied, dark eyes sharp when she forced hers open again. "That's a shitty way to go, I guess," he muttered, mouth twisting sardonically. "Guess I'll move on to the next one, then. You ever see anythin' in those visions of yours that's come true?"

"Yes," she replied simply, honestly. "Lots of things. And some of the things I see have already happened when I see them or are happening just then and I can't do anything anyways, and sometimes I see things that aren't real at all. Daddy said I had something special in my brain that was asleep, and when I almost cooked inside my own skin, it woke it up before it was ready and broke because of it. He said that Blood is the Soul's Memory and my blood remembered stuff but got scared and hurt so I started _knowing_ things, but I couldn't handle it, so my brain broke. Although," she murmured, closing her eyes again. "Daddy always said I wasn't broken, no matter what anyone said…"

"What things have you seen that's come true?" Hat Man asked, something sharp and harsh and deadly in his eyes, fingers twitching, and Aria hummed softly, letting her eyes drift away to focus on the shadows.

"…I saw Mama die," she said quietly. "I saw the Colossal Titan come. I saw the Titan that ate Mama. I saw all the people dying, _all of them_. I heard the screaming. I heard the screaming and begging and dying. The crying and praying." Her voice trailed off, a hoarse whisper, anguish edging in as she dug her fingers into her legs, slowly rocking herself as she fell silent.

"You seen anythin' that's gonna happen soon?" Hat Man asked her, eyes intense, and Aria went still, staring into space for a long moment.

"…The governments gonna murder a lot of us," she whispered quietly. "They're gonna call it an act to reclaim Maria but it's a _culling_. Two hundred and fifty thousand lambs led to slaughter so the pigs can eat their fill without being denied their snacks while the remaining sheep are left to struggle finding hay to eat, and less two hundred of those lambs will come back… Grandpa's gonna die," she whispered hoarsely, jaw shivering as tears began falling. "He's gonna die and there's nothing I can do to save him," she choked, burying her face in her knees as she wept. "They, there are… There are _so many bodies_ and they're _screaming and crying_ and begging. 'Oh God I don't wanna die!' and 'No, no, no, no, no, God please no please!' over and over and over… Th-they're being torn to p-pieces an', an' _eaten alive_ an' dropped like trash when they don't give the Titan what they want, _can't_ give the Titans what they want, not, not enough, not enough, not enough—" the world faded as Aria got trapped in her vision, whispering and mumbling and sobbing wetly as she rocked violently back and forth.

She didn't know how long she was like that. An hour, at least, voice hoarse and choked from crying and talking, eyes swollen and stuck wide-open and horrified. She came to slowly, breaths hitching, shoulders aching from where they were continuously bumping against the chimney as she rocked, and Hat Man staring at her with a blank expression, eyes dark and considering. Staring at him, expression exhausted and eyes dark, she met his eyes quietly.

"…Any more questions?" She asked hoarsely; Hat Man hummed lowly, eyeing her, before letting out a huff and leaning back on the rooftop, throwing an arm up to cover his eyes.

"Fuck's sake, brat," he grumbled. "You ever see anything _happy_ in these visions?"

"Besides you?" Aria asked, before she blinked and, for a second, she saw a flash of something bright and warm, and, in the next blink, something she knew would make Hat Man laugh. A sly smile quirked her lips as he glanced at her from under his arm. "I know I grow up to be taller than your nephew." Hat Man's eyes widened, before something like shocked glee flashed over his face and he threw his head back, guffawing. Aria smiling as she watched him, closing her eyes just to listen, exhausted.

…But it felt nice, knowing her visions could make someone laugh, and not in a mean way…

**()()()()()()**

For the next nine months, Hat Man appeared periodically, once or twice every other week. She knew the moment he appeared, her shadows gleefully urging her to run, and, every time, he easily gave chase. It did wonders for her endurance, her climbing, and her acrobatic abilities. He even taught her how to properly handle a knife and the places to hit if she wanted to make it _hurt_ or if she wanted to make it _quick_.

"Arrogant assholes or information hunters make deaths slow," he told her. "It's sloppy shit, though. If you're gonna kill someone, brat, make it quick and make it permanent. Less likely for them to come back and bite ya in the ass…"

Between those days, she was chasing shadows around the district, finding small jobs and running errands for food and coin alike. She was a regular at one of the brothels, where she helped do the laundry in exchange for a couple coins and being allowed to wash her family's clothes for free. It was exhausting work, dozens of blankets, sheets, dresses, and spare men's clothes that were caked in filth and tears. Whenever she did her laundry, Mikasa usually came with her and silently repaired any torn clothes as long as they had the needed string. It was nice to spend time with her adopted sister, who was usually locked to Eren's side doing work at the market or near the barracks. Armin had gotten a job helping a merchant keep their ledger neat.

…Despite the four of them working, however, they still could barely afford to feed themselves. And Aria knew that, soon, the orders would go out, and Grandpa would be sent to his death. She'd waited until he was alone, the other day, to whisper to him about the Wall Maria Reclamation Act, but the older man had simply smiled quietly at her.

"You're a very brave girl, Aria," he told her gently, pulling her into a tender hug. "And I know that, when I'm gone, you're going to look after my Armin like you do your brother and Mikasa. I know I can trust you to keep them all safe for me." Aria stared over his shoulder as he hugged her, felt the faint tremor that went through him, and closed her eyes.

"I promise, Grandpa," she whispered, and gently hugged him back, ignoring the way that her shoulder got damp as he shuddered again.

"You're a good girl, Aria," he breathed. "A good, brave girl…"

A month later, the Act went through, and Aria watched as the only remaining adult in their lives walked away to his death. When the survivors returned, she stood silently beside her brother as Armin wept into his Grandpa's hat, Mikasa looking away from them from a few feet away. Four orphans with nothing but each other.

"We have to find a way to _stop_ them," Eren whispered as Armin wept. "Our lives will never be our own until we do." Aria glanced at her brother, who stared down at Armin with grim eyes. "This world will never feel like home…" Looking forward, Eren crouched down beside the blond boy, Mikasa and Aria watching them both silently. "That's it. Next year I'll be applying to join the Cadets." Armin looked up, seemingly surprised, although Aria didn't understand why. Joining the Scouts was all that Eren had wanted since they were little, after all.

"To become strong enough to fight back," Eren hissed as Mikasa closed her eyes and Aria tilted her head back to look up at the cracked, filthy ceiling.

"I'm with you," Armin whispered.

"You don't have to—" Ere started, alarmed; Armin glared ahead of him.

"I do!" He interrupted firmly.

"So do I," Mikasa added simply, seriously.

"I as well," Aria agreed calmly.

"Damn it!" Eren snapped, fists white-knuckled against his knees. "I'm not trying to drag you in! Look, there's no point in following me to my death!"

"Yeah," Mikasa agreed, holding his eyes seriously. "And if I can help it than it won't _be_ your death."

"I promised," Aria told him quietly, simply, looking away from the ceiling to meet her brother's eyes. "And besides the promise I made, you're my baby brother. Where you go, I go." Eren stared at her, then at Mikasa, before glancing at Armin. With a determined expression, he got back to his feet, hands fisted at his sides.

"Alright," he declared fiercely. "Together then!"

"Together," Aria agreed as the four of them looked at one another. The shadows were quiet, thrumming with power and _knowing_ , and Aria stared up at the ceiling and closed her eyes.

Behind her lids, the future passed in flashes of blood and love and trauma.

"Together," she whispered again as a tear slipped down her cheek. "Or not at all."

_I promise…_

**()()()()()()**

"The Cadets, huh?" Hat Man asked as Aria struggled to catch her breath, the stinging cuts from his knife a constant reminder that she had nothing on his experience or natural talent. But, compared to ten months ago, she was leagues and leagues beyond her past self.

"Yep," she panted back, groaning as she heaved herself up into a sitting position. "And from there, the Scouts."

"Damn kid, haven't you had enough trauma in your life without willingly lookin' for more?" He asked, arching a brow as he cleaned his knife absently; Aria huffed.

"My brother's joining," she told him simply. "And I know that, together, we'd live. Him, me, Mikasa, Armin. Together, we'll live," she murmured, leaning back with eyes closed.

"Must be nice, havin' that kind of assurance," Hat Man remarked blandly; Aria hummed lowly.

"Not when some things are worse for the surviving," she murmured back. Hat Man hummed lowly.

"Ain't that the truth." The two remained silent for a few minutes before Aria heaved herself to her feet, grimacing as she took in the drying blood rivulets all along her arms. She made a note to stop by the brothel and wash it off before heading home again.

"How are you gonna get past the medical pass, brat?" Hat Man asked her; Aria blinked, looking at him in question. Hat Man arched a brow. "Military has a mandatory health check, kid. They have access to all previous medical records so you can't lie about shit that may get you killed. Only way someone with a brain like yours 'll get in is if you get recommendation from either three low-level soldiers or one high-level. So, how are you getting in?" Aria stared at him blankly for several moments, before slowly turning to stare forward.

"I… I don't know," she whispered, wrapping her arms tightly around her knees. "I… I only really know Hannes, but he's a Garrison soldier. He's up for promotion soon, but… But not high enough to give me a pass… I'll think of something," she muttered, slowly beginning to rock. "I can't… I promised Mama and Daddy and Grandpa," she whispered hoarsely. "I _can't_ let them go alone. I _can't_!" Hat Man grunted and, suddenly, she found his hat shoved roughly onto her head.

"Fuck, brat, take a breath," he complained before taking his hat back and dropping something at her side as Aria stared up at him, wide-eyed. "This'll be the last time we see one another for a while, brat. Don't die. I'd hate to have wasted my damn time teaching a street rat like you," he huffed before stalking away, the whirring of his ODM gear kicking in before he darted away. Aria stared after him for moment, before glancing down at the thing he left behind, picking it up.

It was… It was a letter of recommendation… From Captain Kenny Ackerman of the Military Police… Anti-Personnel Control Squad? With… With a seal of Approval from the _Royal Family_ …

Tears filled her eyes as her fingers trembled, before she gently closed the letter again and tucked it away. Then, she covered her face with her hands and wept with relief.

She didn't have to be left behind.

**()()()()()()**

"Name, age, and hometown," the MP accepting Cadet Applications asked as Eren, Mikasa, and Armin headed off.

"Aria Jaeger, twelve, Shiganshina District," Aria replied simply, calmly. The man grunted, turning to his companion who handed him a folder. Aria recognized it and barely bit back a sigh as the MP glanced it over and sneered at her.

"Recommendation letters or fuck off, brat," he ordered. "We don't take simpletons or crazies into the military."

"Yes sir," she stated, and handed him the lightly crumpled paper. The MP scoffed and opened it.

"What sorry schmuck thought you should—" he cut himself off, color draining from his face as he stared at the letter. His companion peeked over his shoulder before going equally as pale. Aria couldn't help but smile faintly as she stared at them.

"Is it acceptable?" She asked quietly, making the two MP's flinch faintly as they glanced rapidly between her and the letter and back again.

"Y-yeah, go on, um, go on through," the recruiter managed; Aria bobbed her head and padded off in the direction of her family, quietly climbing into the waiting carriage.

"What took so long?" Eren asked her, glaring back towards the recruiter suspiciously as Armin peered at her worriedly.

"I had to hand them my recommendation letter for approval," she said simply, easily.

"Your what?" Eren asked, confused, and Armin gasped.

"Oh man I completely forgot about that!" He stated, alarmed. "The military requires approved recommendation letters for anyone wanting to join the Military who have, erm… _Specific_ medical requirements," he said, trailing off awkwardly with an apologetic glance at Aria. "Without the letters, those people can't join the Military in any capacity."

"What?!" Eren blurted, even as Mikasa leaned over to peer at Aria worriedly. "Wait, if we didn't know about this, how did you get a letter? Did you find Hannes?" Aria smiled at them all easily.

"Hat Man is apparently a Captain in the MP," she informed them easily.

"Whoa, wait, the weird old guy who's been stalking you and chasing you on rooftops and teaching you how to fight with _real knives_ is an MP Captain?!" Eren demanded; Aria nodded.

"I'm just surprised he lets you call him 'hat man' if he's a Captain of the Inner Wall," Mikasa murmured, and Aria shrugged.

"I think it's because no one else calls him anything but 'Captain' and he gets bored," she stated easily.

"I still think its weird that some old guy has been meeting with you when you're alone," Eren muttered, crossing his arms over his chest; Aria rolled her eyes slightly.

"I was more at risk working in the laundry room of Madame Syenna's brothel than I've ever been with Hat Man," she huffed, crossing her arms as well, fingers tapping rapidly. "Even with Mikasa there sometimes, the customers there tended to get creepy."

"Did someone try to touch you," Mikasa demanded quietly, intensely, eyes going dark and vicious as she leaned closer. "I will _eviscerate_ _them_ for you, I promise, just give me their _names_." Aria let herself relax, smiling slightly as she shook her head.

"Don't worry, Mikasa," she assured the other girl warmly. "Madame Syenna took care of them. She has _very_ strict views on how her customers should behave when it comes to underage girls and boys." Mikasa stared at her, searching her face, before slowly pulling back with a short nod, ducking slightly to hide her face in her scarf.

"Good," she murmured darkly, and Aria shook her head with a faint smile as Armin smiled nervously and Eren rolled his eyes. The other six Cadets just stared at them, some confused, a couple pale-faced, and the last one green-tinged and huddling in on himself. The carriage shook sharply as they were suddenly moving. Looking out the back of the carriage as her fingers tapped nervously against her knees, Aria wondered what the next three years would hold for her.

…She was going to miss Hat Man and the games they'd play. Hopefully training would distract her from it. And maybe, just maybe, she'd meet people who wouldn't mind her broken mind.

 _That would be nice_ , she mused as she watched a bird fly overhead.

_That would be nice…_

**()()()()()()**


	5. Chapter Four: Cadets

**Blood in the Air**

**Chapter Four:**

_Cadets_

"Alright, I need everyone to form two lines!" One of the training soldiers ordered clearly over the crowd of Cadet-Hopefuls. "Girls, to the left! Boys, to the right! You'll be getting measured for your uniforms and assigned barracks! Once you're dressed, make your way to courtyard in that direction!" He ordered, pointing off to the left. "Your Drill Sergeant will meet you there! Don't worry about any personal belongings, they will be dropped off at your Barracks once they've been checked for contraband. Now, move it!" Aria and Mikasa pulled away from the boys and made their way placidly towards the female line.

"Man, I hope the uniforms aren't too starchy," a small redhead murmured. "I get chafed easily and the last thing I want is to deal with chafing as well as muscle aches and bruises!"

"Oh, I didn't even _think_ about that!" A brunet groaned, wrinkling her nose. "Ugh, that's going to be a pain… At least we get some nice-looking boys to appreciate~!" She sang, the two of them falling into giggles as they moved forward. Aria and Mikasa glanced at one another in sync, and refrained from rolling their eyes, _barely_. The shadows flickered around the girls, weeping and sobbing, whispering echoes begging for help. Aria looked away from them, fingers fidgeting with her shirt hem. Not that looking away helped. All around her, the shadows wept and screamed and begged for help, grasping at her fellows, making Aria's ears ring until her hands were in white-knuckled fists, nails biting into her palms in an attempt to ground herself. Mikasa elbowed her gently in the side, the sharp pain making Aria flinch but _focus_ , just in time for them to be fitted.

"Change in there," the soldier ordered in the bland way constant repetition caused. "Put this tag on your personal belongings. You're in Barracks G34, 104th Division."

"Yes Sir," Aria told him simply, taking the offered uniform and padding into the building he'd ordered her to. It was what looked like a public bathing area, or, at least, the female bathing area. There were several areas where metal pots could be filled with water to be heated, no doubt a privilege that could be revoked for punishment. There were several places along the ground at two-meter intervals where grates from drainage were placed. Idly, Aria wondered if cleaning them would also be something they had to look forward to, as a quick glance around a separating wall showed toilets as well.

The bare stone room was filled with soft chatter and girls of various ages in various states of dress. Shrugging her shoulders slightly, Aria trotted over to where Mikasa was already down to her underclothes, and began to strip as well. Folding her brown shorts and dark blue shirt carefully, tucking them into the small bag she'd managed to bring (filled mostly with clean underthings donated to her by Madame Syenna and her girls at the Brothel), Aria began to examine her uniform, taking in the white pants, tan half-jacket, belts and hoops.

"Oh no!" A voice somewhere behind her breathed, sounding dismayed. "Where… Where did you get all those scars?" Aria ignored it, until Mikasa tapped her shoulder and nodded to a wide-eyed blond girl with huge, concerned blue eyes. Aria blinked at her, before glancing down at her small, lean body. It was true, she _did_ accumulate scars over the years, especially the last two, with her knife training. She even had yellowing bruises from a nasty tumble off a roof a few weeks before they'd signed up. Shrugging, Aria offered the girl a small half-smile.

"People liked to throw rocks at me when I was younger," she told the girl simply. "So, I found someone who would teach me how to protect myself. Now, _no one_ throws rocks." Smiling faintly, she turned around again, goosebumps beginning to rise on her arms and legs from the faintly chill air in the stone room.

"Th-that's horrible!" The blond girl exclaimed, and Aria could only shrug a bit, reaching for the pants.

"You get used to it," she replied simply. Quickly, she got dressed, although Mikasa had to help her a bit with the belt when Aria's vision flickered, and her hands shook. After that, the two of them headed out towards the ordered courtyard, meeting Eren and Armin on the way. Following directions and orders barked at them after that point, the four were once again separated, set into staggered lines of unknown fellow-Cadets and ordered to stand at-the-ready. Once everyone was there, standing t rest with arms folded behind them, Aria noted that the shadows seemed to be buzzing with interest.

"Straighten those spines, _pissants_!" A strong, hoarse voice bellowed clearing as a vaguely-familiar-looking older man stalked out of the Mess Hall. "The 104th Cadet Boot Camp starts _now_! Allow me to introduce myself! I'm Commander Keith Shadis and you _will_ grow to hate me!" Staring out at them all with sharp gray eyes, the grim-faced man glared.

"Training is going to be a white-knuckled ride through _hell_!" He shouted at them. "If I've done my job, you'll be waking up in a cold sweat from _memories_ of this place _every night_ for the rest of your _miserable lives_! Right now, you're _nothing_ , _livestock_ , but over the next three _soul-crushing years_ , you'll learn to take down your own Goliath! Remember this moment when you come face-to-face him! 'Cause here's where you ask yourself… 'Am I a fighter? Or am I _Feed_?'" He looked around, meeting and holding people's eyes as he went, glaring all along. "'Am I gonna be grounded up into pulpy, human bits 'tween boulder-sized incisors?! _Or am I gonna be the one to bite_?!'" Glaring out at them all, Aria met his eyes when they cast over her, and held them, _focused_ , shadows silent like a held breath at her peripherals.

 _Make it quick_ , Hat Man's voice echoed through her memory, through the shadows, as she stared back at her Instructor. The shadows nearest took his shape, pulling out his wicked knife and baring shadowy teeth in a feral smile. _And make it_ _ **permanent**_ _._

_I'm ready._

_(I promise)_

**()()()()()()()**

The opening… Hazing ritual, Aria decided to call it, ended with the utterly blasé introduction of 'Potato Girl'. After Shadis assigned her his decided punishment (to run around the compound until sundown, or collapse, after lunch, as well as loosing dinner privileges for the next several days), he ordered the entire group off to the training grounds. An obstacle course stretched out before them, filled with climbing walls, pit falls, mud-filled pools with only thin poles, swinging ropes, and a large tree shaved of bark and branches with only short, nub-like pieces remaining and a bell set near the top.

"Listen up, maggots!" Shadis bellowed, glaring at them all. "This obstacle course is going to be your best friend and worst enemy for your stay here! Your objective is to make your way through this course up to that bell! Once rung, you will make your way _back_ here to ring _this_ bell!" He pointed at a small bell on a pole to the side of him. "Those of you who don't drop out like the worthless worms you are, will be expected to run this course once a week unless out on a survival challenge! You _will_ be timed, and you _will_ be expected to improve that time _every. Single. Run_." He glared out at the Cadets, and Aria found her fingers tapping rapidly against her forearms where they rested properly behind her, eying the course. The shadows were shivering, twisting and twitching in anticipation.

It made her think of the chasing games they played on the roofs, that Hat Man played with her. The low-level fear that was her constant state faded quickly under anticipation and _focus_.

"This course is yours to use outside of assigned hours!" Shadis told them clearly. "The only time you can ring these bells, however, is when I or another instructor are here! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!" He _roared_ , and, as one, the Cadets shouted back,

"SIR YES SIR!"

"Get in line, pissants!" He bellowed. "Your first run starts _now_!" Scrambling to obey, the Cadets fell into chaos for several minutes as they tried to form a proper line. Aria found herself standing behind a tall blond boy with slight sideburns and a short bald boy.

"Man, this is _crazy_ ," the bald boy muttered. "Are they _trying_ to kill us?"

"It's probably some sort of hazing," the blond in front of her muttered over his shoulder. "Weed out the weaklings first, the ones who have no physical abilities and such. Make 'em drop out so they don't have to kick them themselves."

"If you're incapable of running through an obstacle course while under supervision without enemies," Aria stated quietly, "then you have no place being in the Military, where lives rely on you being able to move quickly and fight."

"Geez," the bald boy muttered. "I mean, yeah, you're right, but maybe you should relax a little, y'know? Not be so serious?" Aria blinked, turning her head to look at him with a small frown.

"If you thought being in the Military was supposed to be _relaxing_ ," she started slowly, staring at him with a steady frown, "I'd hate to see what career you think is _difficult_."

"Sheesh," he muttered.

"Ruthless," the blond boy muttered.

"I can hear you," Aria responded mildly, lips twitching as she stared straight ahead at the blonds back, watching the hunch of his shoulders as the back of his neck grew red.

"Pipe down and listen up, asshats!" Shadis bellowed from the far front. "Today, your run through the course is just for us to test your baselines! Every one of you is to run through it, no exceptions! You will be graded on two things! First, for accuracy and then for speed! If you fall or can't complete an obstacle, you start that part over until you can! The longer you take, the more painful it will be for you! Once you've run through the entire course, you will return to the bath halls, clean your filthy asses, and meet at the Mess Hall for lunch! Your every failure today will be noted, your speed and ability, noted, your goddamn _attitude_ , _**noted**_! Keep your mouths shut and clench your assholes, maggots! You!" He barked, no doubt at the first cadet in line. "Get started!"

Aria tapped her fingertips against her thighs and bounced idly on her toes. The shadows were whispering eagerly as the darted around her, disappearing up ahead to no-doubt watch the others run through. Anticipation was building and Aria fought to keep from rocking as she waited.

The line couldn't move fast enough in her opinion.

**()()()()()()()**

"Introduce yourself, Cadet!" Shadis barked at her as Aria _finally_ stepped up to the starting line. Immediately, she saluted, hand locking over her heart and eyes locked on her Instructor.

"Aria Jaeger of Shiganshina, Sir!" she started clearly, unblinking even as her eyes unconsciously flickered. Shadis eyed her before bobbing his head curtly.

"Get your ass _moving_ , Cadet Jaeger!" He ordered; Aria nodded sharply.

"Sir Yes Sir!" she declared, turning away; immediately, shadows darted forward, taking on the form of a smirking Hat Man and Aria fell into the familiar pattern of _Follow, Quickly_. Heart pounding in her ears, eyes narrowed slightly with _focus_ , Aria flung herself after the shadow-man as quickly as possible. The first few meters of the obstacle course were loops of wood laid on the ground that she had to speed-step through, followed by a meter-wide ditch she had to leap. After that, there was a short wall to climb, two-meters in height with nothing to cling to. A running leap got her hands over the lip, and two years of roof-climbing had given her the upper body strength required to swing her legs up and over in a neat movement. Shadow-Hat Man was making mocking noises, already meters away, and Aria found a fierce grin curling her lips as she dove after him.

A trio of ditches one after another, a set of poles she was meant to zig-zag through, a see-saw like platform that almost saw her falling when the lip on the opposite end stuck up and caught her toes. Another two-meter climbing wall, this one within leaping distance of _another_ wall, saw her executing an emergency flip Hat Man had taught her to keep from cracking her 'dumbass street-rat skull' on the ground. Then came a wider ditch, this one filled with dull pikes that she landed poorly on the other side with, forcing her to roll. Then came the mud pit, with the meter-high flat-topped poles that she ran over, surprisingly easy to do after roof-hopping on broken or loose tiles. She landed safely and flung herself up the last climbing wall before the tree, this one almost four meters tall with thick, rough rope hanging from it.

Watching shadow-Hat Man swing himself up and over at an angle, Aria followed, appreciating the easier way when she could already feel the trembling ache of her arms, and she still had to climb the tree _and_ make it back to the beginning. _Despite that_ , she thought as she landed with a roll, lunging to her feet and throwing herself after the mocking shadow-man. She threw herself into the climb, rapidly ascending the surprisingly thick branch-nubs she was able to stand on and use to leap higher, for once thankful for her small feet.

_Despite that…_

_She felt more alive than she had since the beginning of_ _**That Day** _ _…_

Her hand slammed on the bell, the clear ringing song ripping through the air, and Aria took a moment to gasp for breath, grinning victoriously, before Shadow-Hat Man cuffed her upside the head and she immediately took off again, this time with him chasing _her_.

_My heart… Feels so light…_

**()()()()()()**

Keith Shadis had recognized the Jaeger Twins as soon as he'd seen them, although it had been years and years since he'd met the boy, and two years since he first met the girl. Eren Jaeger was spitfire and vengeance, a drive that would push him above and beyond his thus-far lackluster performance. Keith remembered the sulky five-year-old Carla had introduced him to, gaunt with worry and stress from the fierce illness that had claimed her daughter, that threatened to _take_ her daughter, but still willing to give him a warm smile and kind word… And Keith also clearly remembered his return of viciousness and prideful insults. He still regretted it, every hurtful word he'd spat on his dear friend that day.

And, like a light, the girl had stepped out of a crowd of judgmental strangers' years later and offered him kindness and comfort he didn't deserve.

Aria Jaeger didn't do her medical reports justice. Or, rather, vice-versa. _Severe Auditory and Visual Hallucinations, disassociation with reality, night terrors, psychosomatic nightmares, memory issues, severe insomnia_ … He'd looked up Grisha and Carla's daughter after that fight, nearly a year after, and found the damning evidence laid bare in cold-cut ink. A laundry list of damnation, proof that even the kindest souls are often plagued with the cruelest fates. Part of him wondered if it wouldn't have been kinder if the fever had taken the poor child, knowing that, if not, then she wasn't destined to live long.

Then, _then_ , on the day Maria Fell, she'd stepped from the crowd when he was at his lowest, weeping in the street like a pathetic creature, and given him comfort. Dark circles under eyes too-old for such a young face, pinched with lingering fear and stress even when soft with a smile. An honest and steady salute, a respectful bow, a warm heart…

Two years had turned that young girl into what he could grimly see was going to be a good _soldier_.

Watching her fling herself through the obstacle course, leaping and flipping through the air like a seasoned Cadet, Keith realized that there was no way he could keep her from the Military, no matter which Division she chose. Not that he could have legitimately sabotaged her, not with _that name_ on her Recommendation, signed and approved by the Royal Family. And nothing he could scream at her, no insult or derisive sentence, would cow her. He'd seen the reports the Shiganshina Garrison had filed, added to her medical files and personal files alike, of the assaults others had taken against her, the number of times she'd been given cracked bones or needed stitches from ignorant asshats throwing rocks and punches and kicks.

No, he wouldn't be able to cow her out of the Corps…

But…

Eren wasn't nearly as physically capable as she was. And the ability to pass the balance-test for the ODM-gear was a mandatory pass-fail test. The Jaeger Twins were like each other's shadows, he knew. Where one went, the other followed.

As the girl flung herself, filthy and sweaty but smiling fiercely, from the course, ringing that second bell and turning to him expectantly, Keith could only offer a sharp nod and a barked order to get herself cleaned up. Watching her walk away in his peripherals, he noted her time and weak points on the report in his hand, grimly noting that she was already in the top five of the ranks so far, placing third place with less than thirty others to go.

… _Like shadows_ , he thought, even as he barked at Springer to get his ass in gear. _Where one goes, the other follows._

_Fail Eren…_

_And Aria will leave as well._

It was the only thing he could do, one last attempt at redemption for his dear friends. One final act of defiance, of _deference_.

For Grisha…

For _Carla_ …

**()()()()()()**

Aria was tired and pleased with herself, hair still slightly damp from her wash after the obstacle course earlier. Sunset was painting the compound deep shades of orange, emphasizing the buildings and shadows. She absently noted that Potato Girl was still running, her stamina higher than her common sense, apparently.

 _Not that I have room to talk_ , she thought amusedly, absently trailing her fingers up and down her arms, feeling the lumps and dips of scars, thin lines from blades and rough patches from rocks and roof tops. She did make note to hold back some food for her, however. Hat Man would give her food, sometimes, if he was planning on a long training session.

"Empty stomachs make dumbasses," she murmured, fondly quoting the man as she absently made her way into the Mess Hall. Eren was on the porch with several others, watching Potato girl run, and Aria absently patted him on the shoulder as she went past him.

"I'll save you a seat," she called softly; Eren sent her a half smile.

"Thanks, sis," he replied. "I'll be in in a moment." With a nod and a small smile, Aria slipped through the doors and headed towards the food line. It was a simple but filling meal, a bone marrow stew with plenty of vegetables and no actual meat, with a small loaf of bread, a little dry but still good. For Aria and her family, who'd been surviving on rations and what little food they could afford, the idea of these simple, _free and filling_ meals made her eyes burn faintly.

 _Count your blessings, brat,_ Hat Man muttered in her ear. _They're too damn few and far between for garbage like us. You can never rely on the_ _ **mercy**_ _of the gods. Remember that when you're in a bind, y'hear me? Prayin' doesn't save anyone that a blade or a punch to the face or a quick move to hide won't. You gotta believe in anythin', believe in your abilities or the abilities of those you trust. Gods don't give a damn about us riffraff. Never have, never will._

"Good ol' Hat Man," she breathed softly, smiling slightly as she carried her food over to the table nearest the wall by the door. She sat in the middle of the table, knowing Eren would prefer the end seat. So even if sitting in the middle made her fingers tap uncomfortably on the table, heartbeat picking up at the idea of being boxed in by strangers, she was at least happy to have the wall at her back and the door within her peripherals so she could see everyone.

The shadows were filled with low hums and murmurs, content from the chasing game earlier. It added an almost eerie hissing quality to the chatter of the Mess Hall, as all the other Cadets eventually trickled in. Eren was soon at the end of the table, offering Aria a playful forehead salute as she passed him the pitcher of water she'd snagged for their table. Soon, however, he was surrounded by curious people and Aria shook her head and continued eating, setting her bread aside to take out to Potato Girl later—

It was then she realized exactly _what_ Eren and his new friends were talking about and her vision narrowed. Her hand trembled and the shadows abruptly echoed, replaying the sounds of screaming and begging and _dying_. The phantom smell and _taste_ of coppery blood and shit filling her senses, robbing her of her appetite. Her hand shook violently, and her spoon fell with a loud clatter she just barely heard, hand frozen, shaking, as she stared blankly at the table and bowl in front of her.

_Blood like rose petals, scattered on the winds._

_Mama being killed, her last few screams echoing louder in her ears._

" _I PROMISE!"_

_The Smiling Titan, dripping blood._

Vaguely, distantly, she could hear Eren talking, voice sharp and strong as he talked about the Scouts, as another Cadet tried to get into an argument with him before the sounds of people walking away, then—

"Eren, did you even think to check on Aria before deciding to leave?" Mikasa's voice was clear, cutting softly through the air off to the side, and then Eren's cursing before, suddenly, something touched her hand, tapping only once on the back of it. She still flinched, shuddering harshly.

"Hey, hey, I'm sorry, it's okay," Eren stated earnestly, looking genuinely contrite and worried. "I'm sorry, Aria, I messed up, I'm sorry." Aria forced herself to breathe, only realizing at that moment that she'd been holding her breath, light-headed and dizzy with it.

"Blood on the wind," she whispered, rocking slowly as Eren sat beside her and Mikasa took her other side. "S-so much blood on the wind, in the air, every breath, so many people screaming, so many, so many…"

"Shh, shh," Eren said softly as Mikasa rubbed her back, Armin appearing across from her with a concerned look as he reached over to gently take her free hand in his, taping their fingers together in the beat of _Rise Up_. "You're safe, you're okay, there is nothing here to hurt you, you're safe, _we're_ safe, it's okay."

"W-what happened?" Armin asked, concerned. "It's been ages since her last, um, vision?"

"Eren was talking about Shiganshina," Mikasa stated simply, calmly. "And about the Titans." Armin winced, leaning over the table to peer up at Aria.

"So many dying, dead, gonna die, die, they're all gonna die," she whispered, rocking between her siblings.

"Is, is she okay?" one of the Cadets asked worriedly; Eren grunted.

"She'll be fine," he told them stiffly; Aria turned her too-wide eyes on her brother.

"Mama's screaming," she choked out, watching his eyes go wide and horrified. "She, she made me p-promise, made me promise before it ate her, I _promised, Eren,_ " she whispered hoarsely and Eren flinched, before reaching up and gripping her head, pulling it forward until Aria found herself buried in his neck.

"I know,' he whispered back hoarsely. "It's, it's okay, Aria. Mom, Mom heard you, she knows you'll keep your promise, okay? You always keep your promises, so she knows you'll keep whatever it was. Take a deep breath, okay? Just, just breathe, _fuck_ , I'm sorry, you're okay…" Aria struggled to focus, trying to reign in the terror and memories and just stared at her brother's collar bone, gasping breaths struggling to slow. Distantly, she heard more people trying to ask what was wrong, what was happening, only to pull away when Armin shakily asked them to.

She didn't know how long she was like that, Armin tapping _Rise Up_ on her fingers while Mikasa rubbed a steady, strong hand along her spine and Eren rocked her slowly, whispered apologies and reassurances as he did, until she finally found herself grounded in reality once more. Slumping in relief, eyes burning with tears, Aria lifted her free arm to pat her brother gently on the back in thanks, hugging him briefly before slowly pulling away.

"S-sorry," she murmured, sitting back carefully, shoulders hunched and eyes down.

"You have nothing to apologize for," Mikasa assured her quietly, seriously, as she reached over with a cloth to wipe her face. Aria winced and sent her a small, exhausted smile, meeting first her eyes, then Armin's, then Eren's.

"Still," she stated, forcing herself to straighten. "I don't, I usually don't collapse like that, when talking about Shiganshina. I just… I wasn't paying attention and then I was listening, and it just _triggered_ —" Aria stopped, forced herself to close her eyes and take a few steady breaths. "Sorry. It won't happen again."

"What _happened_?" One of the other Cadets asked, the one she vaguely recognized as the bald boy from earlier that day (Connie? She wasn't sure, names weren't exactly her forte when the shadows weren't chanting them in her ears).

"Stop that," a taller brunet boy with freckles scolded. "Obviously talking about a _very traumatizing experience_ wasn't something that should have been brought up!" Connie(?) winced and rubbed a hand over his head uncertainly.

"A-ah, heh, yeah, sorry," he muttered; Aria shook her head, shakily sitting forward and carefully picking her spoon back up, catching Armin's hand just long enough to give his fingers a gentle squeeze before pulling away.

"It's fine," she stated clearly, quietly. "You all should be aware, however, that I have brain damage from when I was a very small child. I suffered through a fever so high it essentially cooked my brain in my skull. As a result, I often suffer from hallucinations and short fits like you just saw. If I seem to react to something that's not there or is completely normal to you, don't be surprised, please, if I turn to look at you and those around us briefly. It's how I can more easily tell if something is real or not."

"Whoa, seriously?" Possibly-Connie asked; Aria nodded seriously.

"I also suffer from severe night terrors, nightmares, and insomnia, so don't be surprised if you see me up and wandering in the middle of the night," she told them tiredly. "I'll probably just stick to the obstacle course, now that I know its allowed, but just in case you see me, that's probably what happened. If I'm rocking back and forth and don't respond when you call my name, or when you make a loud noise, like clapping, please don't try touching me. I've, ah, broken peoples bones in the past for it," she admitted, wincing slightly.

"What the hell are you doing here if that's the case?" A broad-shouldered blond boy asked, brow arched, and Aria shrugged.

"Military is one of the best paying jobs there is, no matter your Division," she stated simply. "And I was given a letter of Recommendation from an MP Captain who's been keeping an eye on me the last couple years. It was either the Military or, well, Madame Syenna said I could join her Brothel when I'm old enough if I wanted." She shrugged again, offered a shaky half-smile as several of the boys sputtered, and, at her side, Eren finally relaxed slightly huffing out a breath and crossing his arms over his chest, rolling his eyes faintly.

"You wouldn't last long at the Brothel, Aria," he declared, rolling his eyes. "You can't stand strangers touching your skin, how would you ever get paid? _Armin_ would probably do better there than you."

"H-hey!" Armin squawked, and Aria chuckled softly as Mikasa quietly nudged her side and pushed her bowl closer. Obeying the silent demand from solemn gray eyes, Aria pulled it over to continue eating despite her lack of hunger as Armin and Eren bantered, pulling the other Cadets into it. Once her bowl was clear, Aria tucked her bread away quietly and excused herself, Mikasa stopping her with a gentle hand on her wrist, gray eyes assessing and concerned, and Aria smiled softly.

"Thank you, sister," she stated softly, reaching forward to tug on the girl's long hair. "You should think about cutting this or pinning it back before tomorrow."

"Yeah, Mikasa," Eren added, catching onto their conversation and reaching around Aria's waist to flick Mikasa's hair teasingly. "The ODM-gear training's going to be a pain with it long like this." Aria rolled her eyes as Mikasa was immediately distracted, absently leaning over to press a short kiss to her brother's temple before scooting past them and out from behind the table. Briefly, the shadows emerged to coo mockingly at one of the taller Cadets who was watching Eren and Mikasa with something like betrayal and malice all in one. Not _serious_ malice, but still. Shadow-Hat Man swirled into view briefly to mock the tall boy with the long face wordlessly, grabbing his crotch and making a swooning motion, and Aria barely managed to hold in a snort as she slid past him to drop her bowl off in the kitchen.

She left quietly for the Barracks, exhaustion baring down on her shoulders from a mix of the physical workout of the day and her emotional rollercoaster. She was the first one there, and quickly followed a few shadows to Potato Girls bunk, where she slipped the bread under her pillow before going to her own bed. Mikasa had claimed the top bunk, and Aria smiled faintly up at it before laying on top of her bedding, barely wrinkling the tightly tucked blanket. She left her shoes on the side of the bed, made sure her arms were flat on the bed, and stared, half-lidded, up at the mattress above her. She dozed like that, as the other girls slowly trickled in. Mikasa returned last, hair damp but freshly cut, and leaned over to press a feather-light kiss to Aria's cheek before climbing up into her bed without a word.

Potato Girl wept rapturously over the bread, stuffing it into her mouth with purring coos and muffled moans that made Aria's lips twitch. It wasn't long until the candles were all blown out for bed, and soon after that, the breaths of those around her began steadily evening out. Aria listened quietly, eyes half-lidded, and counted her own heartbeats as the shadows crept along her skin like spiders, pin-pricks and uncomfortable tingling following in their wake. It made goosebumps rise on her skin and anxiety tighten in her throat.

She laid there for a couple hours before fitfully dozing off.

**()()()()()()**

_A flash of swords and the whir of ODM-gear._

_The smell of wet earth and wilderness._

_A sharp, startled cry, choked off abruptly with a sharp gasp and a thump._

_Blood spatter, hot on her face, coating her hands as she clutched a blade drenched in redredredred—_

Aria flinched awake, biting her lip harshly to stifle any sound. She lay there, completely still and struggling to even out her breathing, drenched in a cold sweat as she stared blankly up at Mikasa's bed. After several minutes, she slowly sat up and glanced around, doing an absent head-count as she slowly rocked. A glance out the window at the moon showed she'd slept for barely three-and-a-half hours.

 _It'll have to do,_ she thought grimly as she carefully got up. She grimaced at the faint outline her sweat had left one her bedding, focusing instead on carefully tugging it all back to rights. Tugging at her clinging, wet shirt, she finally just tugged it off over her head, leaving her in her shorts and wrappings as she carefully laid the shirt out over her belongings. They wouldn't be required to change into their uniforms until after breakfast, so she didn't have to worry about it being messed with before then.

Slipping on her shoes, she silently crept from the Barracks, absently rocking back and forth as she went towards the obstacle course. There was no need for a lantern, not with the moon mostly-full and the sky clear. So, instead of letting worry and anxiety and _fear_ rule her, Aria took a deep breath and flung herself through the course. She didn't climb the tree or ring any of the bells, but she worked every other inch of the course for _hours._ She worked until her limbs trembled and she got a stitch in her side, and then she slowly paced around the course, hands folded above her head to let her breath come easier.

It was harder to be afraid when she was exhausted.

"Cadet Jaeger," came a familiar, harsh voice, and Aria spun immediately, falling into a salute as she stood tall and stared straight ahead.

"Sir Yes Sir!" She greeted clearly.

"What in the hell do you think you're doing out of your Barracks at this time, Cadet?" Shadis demanded.

"Sir, working off nightmare induced anxiety and energy in a productive way, Sir!" She replied honestly; the bald man stared at her, the dark circles under his eyes made darker from shadows, whether real or imaginary she couldn't tell.

"And exactly how long have you been doing this, Cadet?" He asked her; Aria glanced up at the sky, calculating the position of the moon from when she woke up.

"…About two or three hours, Sir!" She finally declared with a sharp nod. "I was in the process of cooling down before heading to the bathing hall to clean up, Sir!"

"Do so, Cadet," he ordered sharply. "And know that I will not allow this every night! The only time I want to see you worked so hard you puke is when you're working under my command! You want to work off your energy, you have my permission to clean the bath and Mess Halls! You may use the obstacle course at night _once_ a week, Am I Understood?!"

"Sir Yes Sir!" Aria agreed.

"Dismissed, Cadet Jaeger," he barked.

"Sir!" She agreed, ducking slightly in a half-bow before making a smart about-face and trotting away towards the bath hall. Already she was making a mental list of things she would need to clean it the next night. She understood that working herself to exhaustion during the night _and_ day would be counter-productive, but was ridiculously relieved that the Commander had given her a second option.

There was nothing quite as frustrating as being forced to remain still and silent so she didn't wake others when all she wanted was to _run_.

Easily waving at a sleepily blinking Connie as she passed on her way to the bathroom, Aria absently straightened her dirty, sweaty breast band and decided she would clean it while she was there. Behind her, she missed Connie doing a double-take before promptly walking into a post as he gaped at her shirtless self.

Carrying on, Aria hoped that the next three years would be productive as, around her, the Shadows hissed and whispered and dripped imaginary blood from the sky like red rain.

**()()()()()()**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AKA the Chapter where Aria uses the tried-and-true Jaeger method of Distract-Everyone-With-Something-Crazy-So-They-Don't-Poke-At-My-Emotional-Vulnerability only instead of yelling at them she goes with the purposefully blasé method.

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to explore the idea that instead of Eren inheriting his Titan abilities JUST because of Grisha, they could be inherited through genetics. And, if an embryo split, where would those powers go? And to whom?
> 
> Tell me what you think! I hope I stand true to AoT/SnK's mood!


End file.
